Open Poetry #26 |
Feelings |
QjQ Member Elite
since 2003-04-18
Posts 3756U.S.A. |
Feelings If only I could express my deepest feelings to you without being over zest and with my truest and heart felt honestly that would be conveyed to you with the inter feelings of heart pounding loving thoughts of us being as one to eternity It matters not how you answer, It matters only that i hear you. |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Nicely romantic, QjQ - I enjoyed... |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
this follows your critique message of "from the heart", and if you will pardon me a bit? I truly believe you've a diamond in the rough with this. The sincerety and heart is already amplified. Now? Just add a sprinkle of meter, a dash of assonance for internal rhyme (even in free verse? this makes for a nice read) A mere sprinkle of alliteration and you have got it BABY...oh. grin. I DO get carried away. but I love that you write your heart. THAT is the number one rule for me! |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
QjQ Did you show her this poem? |
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QjQ Member Elite
since 2003-04-18
Posts 3756U.S.A. |
i have no her to show it to sey, It matters not how you answer, It matters only that i hear you. |
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