Open Poetry #24 |
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Uncle Louie's |
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Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
When I left the clinic, the sun was still shining and there were hours left to the day. The Southside looked a lot different than I remembered. Highland Avenue, not so many years before had been a neighborhood of old money. It was still a serene avenue to walk with century old trees and homes, churches and yards meticulously cared for. After the university had come and then the medical center a few years later, this part of town had changed. We liked to think ourselves Bohemian then, but mostly we were stoned, educated and unemployed. I started walking west and the streets became more familiar. The Eldorado, I couldn’t believe it was still standing. I’d photographed it dozens of times, always black and white. It was aging even then, now it appeared little more than crumbling stone and splintered wood tenuously fixed in dying mortar. I topped a short rise in the street and looking south, saw the base of Red Mountain and the cottages built into its rocky side. We’d called them the Hobbit houses. Glenafton Apartments to my right, still aqua, steel and unsightly. Down the hill, then the park. I went into the corner grocery, got a Coke and a pack of peanut butter crackers. Crossed over to the park, climbed to the top of the monkey bars and sat down. I was surprised, but glad to be alone. Now, where to go…first? Who was likely to be least angry, hurt or otherwise disgusted by my face at their door? Uncle Louie’s was the obvious choice, but not without complication. Wonder if he’d made chili today, or fried cabbage and pork? Uncle Louie’s was the local culinary crack house, nothing fancy, nothing healthy, comfort food, biscuits, potatoes, gravy. Yep, Uncle Louie’s was the obvious choice. And the complications? Well, they’d be easier to deal with on a full stomach, right? Forgetting I wasn’t twelve, I jumped from the top of my perch and thanked god when I hit the ground standing. I stuck the half-eaten pack of crackers into my pocket and walked towards Water St., sure I could smell chili and thinking of little else. |
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© Copyright 2003 Duncan - All Rights Reserved | |||
Cpat Hair![]()
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
the tale continues..and you weave it well..drawing the reader into the why..into wanting to know what next...and more about the character.. you write well Dunc... when does the book come out? |
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Midnitesun![]()
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
Smiling as I walked into the past with you. Are you ready to exchange recipes yet, now that we've often exchanged stories? I need a good tofu chili recipe. Mine is adequate, but I have this feeling your version might be a bit spicier, and I could sure use a bit more spice in my life right now! ???did this have anything to do with your poem? LOL. Does it really matter? |
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Mistletoe Angel![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
![]() (smiles) Oh Duncan, that just isn't my type of food, well...I suppose I can stop by for some hand-squeezed orange juice! (big huggssssssss) I do really dig those country diners too, yay, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Duncan, thank you for sharing! ![]() May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
I thoroughly enjoyed this walk with you! I felt I was right there by your side... You engaged my senses and warmed my heart with this wonderful write. Valentine hugs, EA |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
We liked to think ourselves Bohemian then, but mostly we were stoned, educated and unemployed. ============================ I’d photographed it dozens of times, always black and white. It was aging even then, now it appeared little more than crumbling stone and splintered wood tenuously fixed in dying mortar. ========================== I was surprised, but glad to be alone. Now, where to go…first? Who was likely to be least angry, hurt or otherwise disgusted by my face at their door? =========================== Forgetting I wasn’t twelve, I jumped from the top of my perch and thanked god when I hit the ground standing. ============================= I was afraid youd become bored with this, instead you breathed new life into it with the imagery and tour guide view of the characters thoughts and scenery... very cool where you took this...and the way your writing it...one doesnt have to have read the earlier installments to become drawn in and follow along. Dont make the moth wait so long for the next installment ![]() ![]() |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
"We liked to think ourselves Bohemian then, but mostly we were stoned, educated and unemployed." You should write a satirical dictionary. I LOVED that...smile... and yep, I'll hush now. DO continue, Dunc. |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
coming back to this one later D... ![]() |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Duncan--enjoyed this look around, almost as if I was your video cam, especially from the thinking place on top of the monkey bars. I hope you will continue, you made me hungry. |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
Duncan - nice write, very nice... BC |
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