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Open Poetry #24
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For Rainy Days From A Lazy Poet
| Open Poetry #24 |
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For Rainy Days From A Lazy Poet |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Pewter, I decided Was the color clouds took on When it rained as it did that day. A brittle grey filled with syllables Dropping one after next Cancelled plans to hike Thomson’s wash So it was Mt Dew and bed Until I could no longer lie And burgers became an excuse To move. The old Jeep smelled Of her and I. Three days together And already stained seats Had new spots marking places The lust of her was explored on side roads. I reached behind the seat And pulled out the canvas bag And unwrapped the oldest of the books One started years ago and filled with half thoughts Verses that only outlined the perimeter of feelings. I found the passage I was looking for and read, “Today... white mares tails, being blown across a pale blue sky, framed at the horizon by mottled white bones of sycamores, contrasted with the grey black fingers of oak, reminding me, of Winter's beauty” I wrapped it back and tied it. It was late Fall now And Winter would again be Adding flakes of time She was not a Winter person And the passing of seasons I knew Would also mark a passing of us After a fashion, Her bonfire of lust would keep us warm Until she grew bored with the mottled bones Of my thoughts and writing. Then she would move on Seeking someone warmer that did not shiver On cold days when the wind blew words In horizontal lines across sheets of white. “Burgers” I heard myself say out loud to no one. ……………. “Two Burgers” I said when I walked in then noticed her shirt was wetter than mine and knew her lust was on the rise. “Eat first!” I laughed. “I have something for you.” She pouted lips in protest but agreed. I reached in my pocket and pulled out the book I had written us, turned to a blank page And wrote, “ For Rainy Days “ Closed and wrapped the book Then handed it to her “This” I said, “Is yours.” [This message has been edited by Cpat Hair (02-06-2003 06:01 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2003 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
"On cold days when the wind blew words In horizontal lines across sheets of white." I shouldn't really try to pick and choose favourite lines... as I go back for yet another read I find more lines that give me that quick uplifting rush and the word 'ohhh' forms on my lips. You are an amazing writer... this is full of wonderful imagery! Thank you for this smile so early in the day. ~morning hugs~ ~Time has cast a spell on you, |
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Mistletoe Angel 
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (smiles) Wow!!! I'd love to see a spin-off of this in her perspective, it is exciting how we transmit such thoughts to one another and bookmark them at our own will! (big hugggsssssss) I love this, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Ron, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
quote: I know this book.... smiling smiling smiling.... |
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pjtalty Member
since 2002-07-17
Posts 111W.A., Australia |
Intriguing begining, enticing middle and wonderful ending. I was on that journey with you all the way. En route, I was charmed, calmed and warmed by the images; impressed by the style and captured by the tone. Well done and thanks for sharing this with me. Patrick Talty [This message has been edited by pjtalty (02-06-2003 09:29 AM).] |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
nancy..thank you. you say the kindest things. they are much appreciated. noah... this was written as a result of a "challenge" of sorts Ms Devine made to me in adult forums. It is a continuation of a whole series about Mercer's stemming from an original I posted some time ago. You might enjoy reading Ms Devines additions to see it written from another perspective. Sunshine... OK..so I did cheat and pull out a passage from one of those old books, one written long ago in another lifetime. Patrick... glad you found it entertaining. You might see my explanantion to noah and if you are interested read the others in the series over in adult. They are a bit more explicit so I caution everyone. thanks all... the comments are appreciated |
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jellybeans Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298 |
ok, this for some reason, makes me cry... incredible write my friend.....just incredible |
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regards2you Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940California |
Ron, This is absolutely more fulfilling and satisfying than the breakfast I'm about to have. Now, I am not even hungry! Gee, if I keep reading your poetry maybe I can loss the extra twenty (+). Smiling here....soon, I'll go read the rest, but I'll eat first for I've a feeling it's gonna be too rich on an empty stomach. I so enjoy your poetry. Pat  ..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.. |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Ron--Beauiful imagery wraped around very real feelings. Much enjoyed! |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
you did it again..... |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
JB... never intended to make you cry dear friend... there are tears enough in life without me adding to them unneccesarily. Pat..reading me is something one should not do on an empty stomach...but then again not sure you should on a full one either ( chuckling) thanks for the nice words. Martie... dear friend..thank you. Sea.. I did it again? wrote another of those corny tall tales of mine? ( smiling) thank you all... |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Well, Capt., you did do it again....wrote something that I feel like I have to go find the rest of..... but we're not complaining, Sir.  Ethel |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
good God man!  Will you ever stop?*I hope not* |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Today... white mares tails, being blown across a pale blue sky, framed at the horizon by mottled white bones of sycamores, contrasted with the grey black fingers of oak, reminding me, of Winter's beauty” I wrapped it back and tied it. It was late Fall now And Winter would again be Adding flakes of time She was not a Winter person And the passing of seasons I knew Would also mark a passing of us After a fashion, Her bonfire of lust would keep us warm Until she grew bored with the mottled bones Of my thoughts and writing. Then she would move on Seeking someone warmer that did not shiver On cold days when the wind blew words In horizontal lines across sheets of white. ================================= You Rock...and it rolls me Today... white mares tails, being blown across a pale blue sky, framed at the horizon by mottled white bones of sycamores, contrasted with the grey black fingers of oak, reminding me, of Winter's beauty” could that verse be any more stunning???? no said the moth |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
I was reading the two of you in Mature this morning..wasn't sure I could handle reading any more of the story...especially after deVines... *s M |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
Ron, an exquisitely painful read, if that makes any sense. I'll have to wonder over to adult sometime (don't go there often) and check out the rest of the series. Cor |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
"then noticed her shirt was wetter than mine and knew her lust was on the rise." I loved those lines. Maybe I should read more in the adult forum.... Beautiful writing. Susan C. |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Wow, love the above lines. Love the poem too, packed filled with imagery. Maree |
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jellybeans Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298 |
not your fault I cry my friend, this just reminds me when I had 'want to' in my life...and today I have 'barely existing'...sigh...getting older...and learning that those things are in the past and NOT coming back.....sigh.. now your writing is another story...every line superbly crafted.....these should be published.. and yes, I have said that before, but it bears repeating.....and repeating *soft smile* |
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Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
'So it was Mt Dew and bed Until I could no longer lie And burgers became an excuse To move.' I wish I had followed this series, but this sure stands well on it's own. And for reasons I'm not sure about, the lines I quoted above have struck me each time I read this. I love those lines. And I love the idea of the book, too. |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
The lust of her was explored on side roads This is a gorgeous read, Ron. and I can't help not laughing out loud at the above line |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
er, library... |
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
Ron~ This is an incredible write, and I love it. You, sir, are a very talented poet. Hugs, ~Vicky "...until you have read the verse on his heart, |
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GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought |
wow! this is wonderful! Great imagery I don't have the words... but wanted to say, I love this. Always, Alyssa - And so it was that time stood still - |
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