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Magnus

Member Laureate

since 2001-10-10

Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

0 posted 2003-01-02 06:24 PM

Wish of  me...
not to touch,  as coarseness of age
will be felt in place of the smoothness
....of youth.

Give to me...
grace of wisdom,  a sprinkle of  mellow,
a tender taste of passion borne on soaring
wings of  patience and lust entwined
as I breath the fragrant scent
....of love.

Let me...
whisk away the haggard years,  those
where I have shakily stumbled,  fallen on the field
of mistakes.
...as I kneel humbly.

Allow me...
to find the clear and cool water’s
flow of sprite and step,  of spring and walk.
The gently meandering river of life.
...as I roam the wilderness of trials.

Touch my eyes...
with the brilliance of a Nova born anew;
with silken lace flowing over me..
...as I stir in dreams.

[This message has been edited by Magnus (01-02-2003 06:25 PM).]

Jeffrey Carter

Member Elite

since 2000-04-08

Posts 2367
State of constant confusion!

1 posted 2003-01-02 06:28 PM

The whole piece is timeless but I especially love these lines

I'm somewhere in between what is real and just a dream - Lifehouse

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-02-22

Posts 9353
Michigan, USA

2 posted 2003-01-02 06:48 PM

Beautifully written Mag...
TD

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

3 posted 2003-01-02 07:06 PM

Barry

When we dream, we can be touched by anything. This was like that feeling. Lovely to read, my friend.

regards2you
Member Elite

since 2002-10-01

Posts 3940
California

4 posted 2003-01-02 07:11 PM

Barry,

Sighing here. This is wonderful. It whispers. Love it.

Warm regards, Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
"Desiderata"

kayjay
Member Elite

since 2002-06-24

Posts 2015
Oregon

5 posted 2003-01-02 07:24 PM

Give to me...
grace of wisdom,  a sprinkle of  mellow,
a tender taste of passion borne on soaring
wings of  patience and lust entwined
as I breath the fragrant scent
....of love.

This is a wish for all of us with some years on us.  I enjoy your work. KJ

Through rubble and trouble and dark of night
The yawn of a dawn will hasten the light

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

6 posted 2003-01-02 07:28 PM

Very gently and wistfully said Barry.
Much enjoyed the read.
~Hugs~

~Time has cast a spell on you,
So you won't ever forget me~

Corinne
Member Ascendant

since 1999-10-28

Posts 5167
state of confusion

7 posted 2003-01-02 08:15 PM

Such sensuality in this, and hope. Inspirational - love knows no age, sweet friend.

Cor

garysgirl

Member Laureate

since 2002-09-29

Posts 19237
Florida, USA

8 posted 2003-01-02 11:12 PM

Very beautiful, Barry.

"Love makes the world go around"
~~with love and hugs from Ethel~~

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

9 posted 2003-01-03 05:21 AM

another amazing write that leaves me in awe

Paul Wilson

Member Elite

since 2002-07-07

Posts 4711
United States

10 posted 2003-01-03 06:25 AM

Barry...To dream of having youth and wisdom that comes with age would be wonderful.
Enjoyed...Paul

"To share my poems with you is to share my heart with you"

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius

since 2000-10-09

Posts 13989

11 posted 2003-01-03 06:34 AM

Very tender and soft full of hope and love Barry. Well done.

scorpio
Member Ascendant

since 2002-10-02

Posts 5178
right...there

12 posted 2003-01-03 08:43 AM

Very romantic...well done...

believe in what your heart feels...

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

13 posted 2003-01-03 09:16 AM

The last line
is very interesting...
without a pause it reads one way
with a slight pause, yet another...
and thus
is the writer born.

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean

since 1999-07-07

Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

14 posted 2003-01-03 09:20 AM

Barry,
I'm afraid we only get one chance at that, the rest are all echoes. Excellent write.

NewEnglandlazurlu
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-01-04

Posts 7470
A Mountain Paradise

15 posted 2003-01-03 09:23 AM

Barry, this piece just made my whole day. It is so full of wisdom for what we need as we grow older. I loved the whole poem and it was hard to seperate something out but I especially loved these lines:

" ...Let me...
whisk away the haggard years, those
where I have shakily stumbled, fallen on the field
of mistakes.
...as I kneel humbly..."

I think of all your poems that I have read, this has to be my absolute favorite. And is definitely going into my book of special poems.

Hugs, Marti

A poem is never finished, only abandoned.
Paul Valery

VAS
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-16

Posts 7450
Oregon

16 posted 2003-01-03 09:39 AM

too, too fine

a lovely read, it's a new year's poem if I ever read one, don't know if that's your intent, but it happened, nonetheless

I love the layout of it and the way the message unfolds

superb!

Whether on the shoal or on the shore,
I'll seek the lighthouse evermore.

amusemi
Senior Member

since 2001-12-08

Posts 1262
A State of Disarray

17 posted 2003-01-03 09:44 AM

Awesome! It certainly is a time for reflection and introspection. I can't imagine it could be said any better.

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