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serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

0 posted 2002-12-09 04:26 AM

Once?

She didn't dress the part.

She wore lace and frill.

The coquette saying, "chalk my stick?"

(And closed her eyes, the balls were willed...)

Anything she'd ask of them.

That is what they'd do.

Everytime.

(She sank a few.)

The guys all inched eternal shrug

and tapped their feet impatiently
Once?

bemoaning

this beginner's luck.

I loved to watch
my sister dance
her eyes
a huntressed falconry...

She racked the balls
proficiently--
ran the table
to its knees

and all of them
would beg for chance
and bets
were placed accordingly

Once?

I watched her dress the part.

She wore no feathers, gave no thrill.

She smoothed her hands in talcum

and rolled the stick

in shrewd eye's kill.

(This time)

she broke. She didn't stop.

The chatter ceased. We heard the drop

of concentration

laser-eyed...

First time

I ever saw her smile,

burying

the black of eight.

She tipped her hat
and she walked out,

and left her money there.

My sister is a bad pool shark.

She doesn't count the gold.

[This message has been edited by serenity blaze (12-09-2002 04:39 AM).]

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius

since 2000-10-09

Posts 13989

1 posted 2002-12-09 05:52 AM

Karen I will have to make sure Bill shares this one with his pool league. I believe they have experienced a pool shark here or there along their travels. Good write Seren.

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

2 posted 2002-12-09 07:45 AM

I loved to watch
my sister dance
her eyes
a huntressed falconry...

She racked the balls
proficiently--
ran the table
to its knees

and all of them
would beg for chance
and bets
were placed accordingly

================================

you immortalize her in rhymes divine,
could see you both there working the room, smiling.
(this begs to be a prose piece, ya know)

just one line ... one rhyme ... one metered verse ...
if only I could inspire in you ... promised poetic coerce.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

3 posted 2002-12-09 09:03 AM

Love this Karen...
Sounds as though you're sister is a real pool shark.
Great enjoyable read this ayem.
~Hugs~

~ Life is too short not to believe in Santa Claus ~

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

4 posted 2002-12-09 11:13 AM

serenity

Very colorful character sketch...much enjoyed!

garysgirl

Member Laureate

since 2002-09-29

Posts 19237
Florida, USA

5 posted 2002-12-09 11:19 AM

Serenity, your sister sounds like she's a mess, just like you...

BTW,I hope you know that a "mess" is a good person in my language..)

My late husband was a pool shark. Lots of stories, there...

"Love makes the world go around"
~~with love and hugs from Ethel~~

Salty
Senior Member

since 2002-11-23

Posts 669
Texas

6 posted 2002-12-09 11:27 AM

THis was such a fun read....I would love to be there watching your sister in action.

You did a very fine job with this serenty

~Salty

In the Midst of movement and chaos, keep stillness inside of you.
--Deepak Chop

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

7 posted 2002-12-09 03:05 PM

I'd have loved to watch her too. She sounds very special. I loved the way you wrote this out.

Dark Angel
Member Patricius

since 1999-08-04

Posts 10095

8 posted 2002-12-09 03:10 PM

Hey Gorgeous, this is terrific and I agree with JM... "this begs to be a prose piece"

hugs

Maree

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

9 posted 2002-12-09 03:24 PM

You know I would have loved to have been part of that scenario as I love to work a room, and you could have used an agent yes? Oh this is awesome, and your sister must be so proud of you that you can indeed capture moments in time and immortalize them.

Season's Greetings
from my home in Canada to yours!

scorpio
Member Ascendant

since 2002-10-02

Posts 5178
right...there

10 posted 2002-12-09 03:28 PM

When she racked them up, she broke a few hearts on the break...I loved the scene created in this write...very well done...

believe in what your heart feels...

Poet deVine

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-26

Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley

11 posted 2002-12-09 08:21 PM

This evokes the sound of the balls clicking against each other..the sound of the balls dropping into the pockets..and the whispered hush of the crowd. Loved it!

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