My First Poem. What do you think?

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LifeForce4
New Member

since 2002-11-29

Posts 1

0 posted 2002-11-29 03:14 AM

This is my first poem ever and wanted to know what you thought of it.

My Friend

Who is all ways there,
To pick me up when I'm down,
Never make you feel bad,
And is all ways around.

Who can light up the room,
With her smile and cheer,
Who all ways cares,
And makes you forget your fears.

Who touches your heart,
Will be with you to the end,
A blessing to be with,
Is a great friend.

No one else better,
She's an angel to me,
If it's just a dream,
I hope I never wake.

Who is this person,
That has all this?
None other then,
My Friend!

Thanks,
Kyle

Salty
Senior Member

since 2002-11-23

Posts 669
Texas

1 posted 2002-11-29 03:30 AM

EXCELLENT!!!!!!!!

You did a great job first poem or not.
A very meaningful write with words that express well.

You must have some talent there Kyle *S*

Salty

PoeticJustice
Junior Member

since 2002-11-29

Posts 44
AK, USA

2 posted 2002-11-29 05:00 AM

That rocks man. The flow is excellent and the meaning is true.

EagleOne
Member Elite

since 2000-03-07

Posts 2829
Between a laugh and a tear...

3 posted 2002-11-29 06:05 AM

Nice to have such a friend, welcome!

I don't know where I'm running now, I'm just running on... ~ Jackson Browne

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

4 posted 2002-11-29 07:16 AM

Welcome to Passions! I think I'm going to like your writings - stretch your poetic muscles...do a lot of reading, share with us your future pennings, and get comfortable. We're a big family...so you've many to meet!

Please, check your E-mail for a Special Greeting!

Karilea
If I whisper, will you listen?...
I would rather be silent and write, than speak loudly and be bound

scorpio
Member Ascendant

since 2002-10-02

Posts 5178
right...there

5 posted 2002-11-29 08:21 AM

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

6 posted 2002-11-29 09:33 AM

Your first poem ever? Well, I must tell you, I am looking forward to sharing your poetic journey with you! Your writing debut is quite impressive! Welcome aboard!

Earth Angel

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-02-22

Posts 9353
Michigan, USA

7 posted 2002-11-29 09:40 AM

Welcome.
Happy to read you. I have always believed, no matter how packaged...it is the depth of the piece that determines it's worth...

A+++

Hope to enjoy more works from you...good use makes the well sweeter. ThisDiamond

Nightshade

Member Patricius

since 2001-08-31

Posts 13962
just out of reach

8 posted 2002-11-29 09:59 AM

Welcome To Passions!! Enjoy yourself here. Nicely written first poem. Chris

"Hope" is the thing with feathers-
that perches in the soul....

-Emily Dickinson

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

9 posted 2002-11-29 12:57 PM

Yay!!! Oh Kyle, this is wonderful and so beautiful, and you are such a special friend to us all as we are already looking so forward to reading many more of your smiles through your lovely poetry, yay! This is a gorgeous debut, I LOVE IT!!! Welcome to Passions, sweet Kyle, may you be inspired by all of us here as we will all be inspired by your lovely words! I can't wait to read more of your lovely words, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Kyle, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

10 posted 2002-11-29 01:00 PM

WElcome, and thanks for sharing your wonderful friendship thoughts.
Wnjoy your day, every day.

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