»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #23
»
Boom
| Open Poetry #23 |
|
Boom |
|
Mistletoe Angel 
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
Boom By: Noah Eaton 11/21/02 You've got it all You've sold it all What do you have to say for yourself? You live a lie And you try And make it so hard on yourself You tie your fate Like a makeweight Think you can jump far down When the farthest you'll ever be You will see Is only where you started now You have blood on your hands You know you've crossed that line Stick your hand in that cookie jar To hide that fortune you wish to suffice You say what you say in parataxis But the verdict comes through hypotaxis These uncharted waters you know Were not meant to be yours alone You only cover your ears So the breakdown doesn't deafen you When you hear the boom... I'm just a ridicule I'm just a miniscule Written in incoercible handwriting An incantation An improvisation A prop for your dress rehearsal scene There's room for squares But why try to bear When we're caught in this Hermaneutiz circle? Where I'm just a trope Without a home Not understanding the whole contiguity in this cycle You have blood on your hands You know you've crossed that line Stick your hand in that cookie jar To hide that fortune you wish to suffice You say what you say in parataxis But the verdict comes through hypotaxis These uncharted waters you know Were not meant to be yours alone You only cover your ears So the breakdown doesn't deafen you When you hear the boom... Kaboom! Kaboom! Kaboom! Kaboom! (This is a more harsh sounding song I wrote! Almost all of my songs sound soft and romantic or sad and this one has a rockier edge!) "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." Shakira [This message has been edited by Mistletoe Angel (11-22-2002 11:51 PM).] |
||
| © Copyright 2002 Nadia Lockheart - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
kayjay Member Elite
since 2002-06-24
Posts 2015Oregon |
It is very charming to hear your works and impressions, Noah. You've a wonderful knowledge of word meanings and clausal relationships. Thanks for sharing with us. KJ Through rubble and trouble and dark of night |
||
|
Aenimal Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350the ass-end of space |
Was wondering where you were haven't seen a post in a few days. Nothing wrong with a little edge now and then. Rock on! lol |
||
|
Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
I wish I could hear this as an actual song, Noah... Its very edgy and different from your usual writing... which makes it extremely interesting... I enjoyed it a lot  ~ loving rodent hugsLyra |
||
Paul Wilson
since 2002-07-07
Posts 4711United States |
Noah...You have many talents and now song writting, I'm very impressed. I only wish that I had half of the talent you have. Enjoyed...Paul [This message has been edited by Paul Wilson (11-23-2002 12:35 AM).] |
||
|
garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Noah, this is really good. Like the others said, it's different from what you usually write, but still very good. I'd like to hear the music to it, too. I'll bet it's really good. Yo are so talented, friend. Thanks for sharing your talents with us. "Love makes the world go around" |
||
|
vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
enjoyed  |
||
|
VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
quite a biting piece, Noah, but I have a quick poem for you: Oh no, Oh no, it can not be, does our Noah have some writer's block? No new posts since Nov. 26, that's eleven days of no Noah's raise! Are you well? Please tell, please tell! Hope you're on vacation living it up with family and turkey, and turkey leftovers. *  *Virginia Whether on the shoal or on the shore, |
||
|
Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (big hugggssssssss) Thank you all for your wonderful comments! You are all the best friends! Virginia: I am very glad you have noticed my inactivity as far as starting posts. The fact is, I do not have writers block, but have been derailed from my writing abilities lately due to the finals coming up and their interference with my time to be able to creatively put thoughts on paper! Today, I have actually officially climbed over the peak of the mountain and by the time I make my 20,000th post I will have something new in store then! You just wait, I'll come back with a vengeance! LOL! (kiss on cheek) Thank you Virginia for your concern, you are the best! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
||
|
WinterWren Senior Member
since 2002-12-01
Posts 1044...Coming to |
That was a very expressive song. I loved it! You are so kind to everyone here, thank you for sharing your kind heart! Laugh often, love much, live well. WinterWren |
||
|
Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Very nicely done sidekick! I'm so glad this one popped back up as I seem to have missed it last time 'round. You take care of your finals and the words for a new poem will come soon enough sweetie. Take care....cause I care. ~Hugs~ ~ Life is too short not to believe in Santa Claus ~ |
||
|
scorpio Member Ascendant
since 2002-10-02
Posts 5178right...there |
Rock on Noah... believe in what your heart feels... |
||
|
Sunkissed Senior Member
since 2002-12-03
Posts 610 |
Sometimes it's good to shake things up a little. You've done so superbly. Sunkissed |
||
|
Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
Noah - it's good to read your writings again... BC |
||
|
Sandpiper Senior Member
since 2002-06-15
Posts 738land of flora and fauna |
"You only cover your ears So the breakdown doesn't deafen you When you hear the boom..." Sometimes, we simply must face the music--powerful!! "And it was at that age...Poetry arrived in search of me...And something started in my soul." |
||
|
passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
definately not your usual style, but good anyhow |
||
|
ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
A little change but very very well done Noah! |
||
|
Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
This was not only rockier but it had a biting edge that turned it into a precipice. BOOM! get that dynamite and carve out a niche, but don't go deaf in the process for where would we be without your songs. Kethry Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown |
||
|
ThisDiamond Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353Michigan, USA |
Hi! I believe it is that earthy steel that shimmers the soft and smooth for our most notable accomplishments. Strong write! ThisDiamond |
||
|
Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
I heard that one over here, Noah! Enjoyed the way it rocked my castle. |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
