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serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

0 posted 2002-11-21 05:08 AM

We take
the tragedies--
condensed--
readers digest
recompense
and finger hole
into cheesecloth
and make the way
for curd of sloth
into the churn
we grasp the pole
mimicking
creation sold
it does take sweat
to make milk--cream--
native drums
keep time obscene

You can feel
the thickening--
the chore
becomes
a quickening--
strain the fat
for butter's sake
and pump
and pump
until brow breaks

Ladle lumps
upon the cloth
in hardening
of land 'o lake

scrape the burn
from off your toast
and rub a bit of heaven's salve

No jellies will be needed now.
There is black dust upon my plate.

[This message has been edited by serenity blaze (11-21-2002 05:43 AM).]

Paul Wilson

Member Elite

since 2002-07-07

Posts 4711
United States

1 posted 2002-11-21 06:28 AM

Serenity~ How about some grits & eggs or rice & eggs. Enjoyed this churning write...Paul

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

2 posted 2002-11-21 06:49 AM

Passing the plate for
another serving, please...

Sandpiper
Senior Member

since 2002-06-15

Posts 738
land of flora and fauna

3 posted 2002-11-21 07:51 AM

wise words, well written--enjoyed!

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean

since 1999-07-07

Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

4 posted 2002-11-21 08:00 AM

Serenity,
Enjoyed the bouquet of wild symbols.

Poet deVine

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-26

Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley

5 posted 2002-11-21 08:15 AM

Life is like butter on my toast...interesting write.

Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

6 posted 2002-11-21 08:18 AM

nicely done Ser.... enjoyed

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

7 posted 2002-11-21 08:23 AM

butter? yeah...your rhymes are smooth as.
(and your metaphors aint half baked either)

very cool and clever employ of symbols and theme here me twin...
thanks for the toast with me tea

No one has ever shown me how to see the world the way I see it now ...
and I never saw blue like that before.

~Tom Kimmel~

garysgirl

Member Laureate

since 2002-09-29

Posts 19237
Florida, USA

8 posted 2002-11-21 08:32 AM

Karen, can you really make butter yourself??
You make everything soumd so real, I just was
wondering.....by the way, do you like grits, too??
I sure do. think I'll go fix some to eat with
my toast.
I enjoyed reading.

"Love makes the world go around"
~~with love and hugs from Ethel~~

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

9 posted 2002-11-21 09:31 PM

park-ay?

thanks all..

and no ethel, I've never actually made butter, but I am quite famous for my cream!

bsquirrel

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-01-03

Posts 7855

10 posted 2002-11-26 02:10 PM

So the poem is tinged in grave dust.
And then your response bursts with um ... cream.

mk

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