navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #23 » ballet
Open Poetry #23
Post A Reply Post New Topic ballet Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Effigy
Member
since 2000-04-11
Posts 486
disbelief

0 posted 2002-10-15 12:24 PM



elegant dancing shimmers of light
reflect from shinny worn remains
of less than ballerinas and more spare change rattles like drums beating out rhythms echoing
from empty auditorium seats cob web paradise
where light shimmers such as shaman
dancing to aboriginal drum beats mix into a subversive subcultural
ballet melody drifting through
cool night air humid and steamy
flamingly abstract notes whisper angel soft like young punks terrorizing
old ladies with less memories
of today then yesterday
ballet
dance old lady
dance



[This message has been edited by Effigy (10-15-2002 12:25 AM).]

© Copyright 2002 wes wiggins - All Rights Reserved
VAS
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450
Oregon
1 posted 2002-10-15 10:17 AM


amazing images strewn through this...I hope you don't mind, but it's almost like words have been tossed into a blender with dancing on their mind, and what has come about is what one would see when the blender is at its spin

a concoction that is mesmerizing, captivating, but not easily understood, perceived

Whether on the shoal or on the shore,
I'll seek the lighthouse evermore.

WhiteRose
Member Elite
since 2002-07-23
Posts 3208
somebody's dungeon
2 posted 2002-10-15 10:19 AM


Wow! This is incredible. It is as if the words just danced out onto the page. Wonderful!
Effigy
Member
since 2000-04-11
Posts 486
disbelief
3 posted 2002-10-15 01:41 PM


Thank you. That is in essience the affect that I was going for. It was pure free thought.
FuzzyFrazzledFraggle
Member
since 2002-09-20
Posts 155
Fraggle Rock
4 posted 2002-10-23 01:56 AM


love your style..and such..hrm..brain frazzled..perhaps I should go to bed!? wish I could be more orginal tonight..

Consider yourself fuzzed


[This message has been edited by FuzzyFrazzledFraggle (10-23-2002 01:58 AM).]

WhileIWasGone
Member
since 2002-07-18
Posts 486

5 posted 2002-10-23 02:10 AM


Beautiful...enjoyed very much.

DeaDiAmore

brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
6 posted 2002-10-23 07:06 PM


Wes, reading this two writers come to mind "Burroughs" and "Jim Morrison" this meant as a compliment. Such wonderful vivid images. This one is for the library. Great read.

The ladders of life that we scale merrily Move mysteriously around So that when you think you're climbing up, man In fact you're climbing down-Nick ca

forne_marin
Member
since 2004-04-13
Posts 140
Spartanburg, South Carolina
7 posted 2004-05-14 08:49 AM


This is really good. I like this. I agree with the statement above. It's as if the words were thrown in a blender and came out dancing. The first read through is a little overwhelming, but that's not a critique. That's just a statement, and it can be good or bad. The only negative thing I have to say is that you mispelled "shiny".
Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #23 » ballet

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary