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Teen Poetry #6
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Tears of Blood(comments?)
| Teen Poetry #6 |
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Tears of Blood(comments?) |
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Attila Junior Member
since 2002-10-14
Posts 17USA |
Trying to forget the pain and the hurt That billows withen me like a flimsy white satin curtain in the wind The pain caused by others claws at my heart leaving scars It gnaws on my soul stubburnly refusing to eat it away The hurt caused by you works from the center of the heart to deepen the scars It spits on my soul statically smiling like a false refuge I rage against the storm birthing a nebulous of pain because I fell at your feet and let your ignorance and niavete beat me again My heart and soul are tortured and dieing giving up this pursuit of life My body is bruised and failing unable to bring itself upon you Drowning in my own self misery its coming in six feet over my head Forced by your misplaced affections, the tombstone reads you Birthdate is yours and the day of death the same Drowning in my tears of love, tears I don't cry, I never cry But if I did I would die For the magnitude of betrayal and unjustified pain Cannot be withheld in a single lonely tear drop so out my eyes comes my soul, ready to die As I drain me dry, and bleed into deaths loving arms I am drowning in my bloody tears. [This message has been edited by Attila (11-14-2002 09:38 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2002 Attila - All Rights Reserved | |||
SEA 
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
pain, heartache and such terrible sadness radiates from your words....(((hugs))) for you, just cause... my only suggestion, and not to be a jerk, but you asked for comments here, use a spell checker. It will give your poem a stronger impact. But as for the emotions you expressed, you made me ache just reading.... |
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Attila Junior Member
since 2002-10-14
Posts 17USA |
That was not jerky at all. I did need to spell check and I am sure there are still errors in there..I am a horrid speller, and bad typer. Thanks for the hug and the compliments I was wondering if this would go over well, I like it but that dosent always mean much! Attila |
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