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Sweetpoet16m4u04
Member

since 2002-11-10

Posts 153
Ma, U.S.A

0 posted 2002-11-10 10:21 PM

Goodbye’s

Goodbye’s are always the hardest things to say
You just meet someone new and call him or her a friend
Before you know it they have gone away,
And what used to be the beginning has quickly became the end.

Why are these words so hard to say, you ask?
When only you want to see it last
Nobody wants to see all the tears,
You want this friendship to grow year after year.

This weekend is now winding down
Please do me a favor and don’t frown.
We both know we may never see each other again,
But we also know we don’t want this to end.

So I guess I have to say it now
Although it means so much pain and sorrow
When you know everybody will be gone tomorrow
This sad and meaningful word Goodbye!

Darkness
Member

since 2002-10-17

Posts 202
The place just beyond my eyes, where my spirit flies.

1 posted 2002-11-11 09:35 AM

Good poem I agree whole heartedly. This poem reminds me of a song:

"And you say you've got that feeling again. It's not long enough, but it may never end."

I like the rhyme scheme(s) as well.

Write on...
Darkness

Sweetpoet16m4u04
Member

since 2002-11-10

Posts 153
Ma, U.S.A

2 posted 2002-11-11 04:55 PM

Any more thoughts??

Local Parasite

Member Elite

since 2001-11-05

Posts 2527
Transylconia, Winnipeg

3 posted 2002-11-13 03:43 PM

This is alright... I don't know if I care for the eye rhyme in the last stanza though, it kind of interrupted the flow a little for me. I do however like the overall structure of this piece... you formatted it quite well.

Good work. And as to your prompt for "more comments," you get back what you put into this forum.

Parasite

Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.
~Aldous Huxley

roxywrestlegirl04
Member

since 2002-10-29

Posts 74
good ole DINWIDDIE

4 posted 2002-11-13 09:35 PM

i like it ALOT.....very good....i wrote a poem just recently on the SAME subject!! haha....anywayz...hope to read more of your stuff
LIZ

majnu

Senior Member

since 2002-10-13

Posts 1088
SF Bay Area

5 posted 2002-11-13 10:17 PM

nice. the first stanza particularly hit me

-majnu
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Timid thoughts be not afraid. I am a Poet.

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