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Teen Poetry #6
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Crystalization (a choka)
| Teen Poetry #6 |
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Crystalization (a choka) |
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Skyfire 
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381Riding 
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Crystalization of any girlie mindset of my heart and lungs. Examine my black wrist cuff, ride with me tonight (maybe I don't deserve this) talk behind my back kiss up; it's what you do best. Don't forget to call, I might up and walk away, a deal incomplete. I'd let you see my dark side... I'd rather play my guitar. *~* I'd appreciate it if you guys didn't give critiques on this one. Personal reasons, but it would be much appreciated  |
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| © Copyright 2002 Rhonda Adolph - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Surreal Junior Member
since 2002-10-21
Posts 35Paris |
Well I have no critisicm to give anyway. There was something about this piece that really drew me to it. I loved the abruptness of the tone and the images were wonderful. Glory is a silent thing-- Mineral |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
No damn you. I'm going to critique it all to hell.  jk, jk The last two lines caught my eye. I feel the exact same way. Take care of yourself, ok? ~AF~ Anti Lemming Crusader - Fight against the conformity! |
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Marshalzu
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681Lurking |
I like this more and more everytime I read it, thank you for sharing this with us Andrew |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg |
Nice. |
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
Rhonda~ I REALLY like this. Love the bit of 'attitude' that I felt in your words. Very well expressed, my friend. Hugs, ~Vicky "...until you have read the verse on his heart, |
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