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SimpleDiscourse
Member

since 2003-04-24

Posts 79

0 posted 2003-08-09 09:38 PM

A girl
Far too young
To be worried about life
Sits writing overdone poetry
That asks too many questions
That won’t ever be answered
Because she’s too afraid
To ask someone real
So she continues
To ask her pen and blank page
To help her find the answers
She longs for
All she feels
All she thinks
Are put into verse
And they never feel quite real
To her
Once a line is written down
She will move on and forget
Because it has left her
For a stanza
That will never be read
By someone who could understand.

A girl
Far too young
To be worried about love
Sits writing empty imagery
That portrays things
She’s never experienced
Because she’s too alone
To love someone real
So she continues
To use her pen and blank page
To create the picture perfect moments
She longs for
All she needs
All she desires
Are put into verse
And they never feel quite real
To her
Once a line is written down
She will move on and forget
Because it has left her
For a stanza
That will never be read
By someone who could understand.

Alnilam
Member

since 2003-07-04

Posts 75

1 posted 2003-08-09 09:56 PM

Wonderful! I love the way it flows and its message as well. thanks for a great read

~*Alnilam*~
"The worst tragedy for a poet is to be admired through being misunderstood."

frolicking dolphin
Member

since 2003-02-23

Posts 268
my own special world

2 posted 2003-08-10 10:44 AM

I love this one because that's basically what I write about with poetry, perfect moments and a perfect relationship, it flows really well and is so true

~*~Karen~*~

~Dream like you'll live forever,live like you'll die tomorrow~

blueyedlioness
Member

since 2003-04-24

Posts 289
USA

3 posted 2003-08-10 12:17 PM

Um.

Okay.

Ah...

I only wish I'd been the one to write it. You just told me how I feel. Absolutely incredible...

-Lioness

Cinderelly
Member

since 2001-12-31

Posts 189
NM, USA

4 posted 2003-08-14 02:27 AM

I really liked this poem . . . Great write!

Life is a moderately good play w/ a badly written thrid act. - Unknown

SilentTears
Member

since 2003-02-15

Posts 371
Lost and Broken

5 posted 2003-08-15 03:24 PM

I really like this! (My Mom enjoyed it, too!

)I think this is a very creative idea, the way you used poetry terms. The poem flows very well...and the word usage, in my opinion, is perfect! Nice write! This will definitely be going into my library!

"I would sleep forever, if it meant I'd never stop dreaming..."

peachesNcream
Senior Member

since 2001-08-21

Posts 513
Ocean Of Tears

6 posted 2003-08-16 01:27 AM

SilentTears read my mind, I feel the same way! Great work! ~Jess

"At the touch of love, everything becomes a poem." -Plato

Pollita
Member

since 2002-07-25

Posts 220
the unknown realm of insanity

7 posted 2003-08-16 04:11 AM

This poem is really well written! phemomenal job! keep up the good work!

* A wise monkey never monkies with another monkey's monkey *

Pollita
Member

since 2002-07-25

Posts 220
the unknown realm of insanity

8 posted 2003-08-16 04:12 AM

This poem is really well written! phenomenal job! keep up the good work!

* A wise monkey never monkies with another monkey's monkey *

layla
Member

since 2000-11-19

Posts 74

9 posted 2003-08-16 05:58 AM

I agree with lioness, after the first few lines I'm thinking this is exactly how I feel!!!!! Amazing job, thank you for the post

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