Teen Poetry #6 |
Pink Pajamas |
collarbone_girl Junior Member
since 2003-07-14
Posts 45Wonderland |
even as i lie in my sea of purple covers with the moonlight in my window today on my mind and yesterdays sweat on my back (your sweat) -invisible tears f a l l across my face- where they should be wiped away by your hands last weeks eyeliner smudged under sleep starved hazel eyes wispy curls hanging from my unwashed tied up hair my pretty pink pajamas hanging off - my hips - you can still see my *you,food,him,love,touch fear depth,sorrow,joy* deprived ribs where my heart beats solely for -every stranger i know- -everything i am- -everything i could be- -and everything you- -want me to- -be- This Cool Night Air Is Curious... |
||
© Copyright 2003 Bee - All Rights Reserved | |||
jaysh Member
since 2003-04-16
Posts 133IL, USA |
Another great write!! I love the way your do your spacing. This was beautiful, you have alot of talent! |
||
Riley
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038in the pouring rain |
talent, truth...great write all together....amazing riley * the pouring rain kisses my lips with innocence as you look into my eyes * |
||
lingering thoughts Member
since 2003-05-03
Posts 70Illinois, USA |
Yay!* i really like this one haven't read any others of yours... hope they are as good as this one * nice spacing and choice of words CaSSandra* |
||
Pollita Member
since 2002-07-25
Posts 220the unknown realm of insanity |
Truely a great write, Thank you for sharing. * A wise monkey never monkies with another monkey's monkey * |
||
dertah Senior Member
since 2003-06-18
Posts 584 |
wow, intersting. |
||
Lexy Senior Member
since 2003-01-28
Posts 1038California |
very interesting, I think I will put it in my library for further reading and pondering purposes great job. ~Lex [This message has been edited by Lexy (08-04-2003 06:35 PM).] |
||
*Belabebeautiful*
since 2003-01-03
Posts 696washington, USA |
I must say that I truley enjoy your work. I haven't read one so far that didn't tickle my fancy so to speak. And I love the things that I am constantly pulling out of your poetry to think about. You have an amazing talent for making a reader think about something that they might otherwise miss, just in the way that you write. That is a unique and very specail quality and I look foward to more of it. The poem itself was another good one, I like the way you pull of spacing to make a reader "see" certain words and I just loved the title and how it fit into the poem. Lovely write ~Live and Luagh~ The problem with resisting temptation is you never know if you'll get the chance again |
||
Deep_Inside Member
since 2002-02-14
Posts 377i can't stop hiding |
good wtrite a little confusing but i think i got keep posting |
||
⇧ top of page ⇧ | ||
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |