Teen Poetry #6 |
My Burden |
Silent Evincar Member
since 2003-07-22
Posts 179Here There and Places Between |
Where has my soul gone sense you left me? How has your heart flocked to another? Was I not what you deepest desired? Yet I can't fulfill your senseless heart. My arms were only ment to hold you, You pleased yourself by walking away. I gave my Love to you and be the deepest, You strolled in it like a shallow sea. The water you bathed in teared from my eyes, Dry,naked, and blind you pranced away. So I screamed for you in my deepest thoughts. Why did you take my soul and capture my heart? (You'll have to forgive this poem... its some of my early work I just had to share. Be prepared you may see more.) |
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© Copyright 2003 Nicholas Stauffer - All Rights Reserved | |||
Peeps-Peter Junior Member
since 2003-07-19
Posts 14 |
This was an awesome piece of work. I will be eargerly awaiting more from you. ~Peter |
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Star T Member
since 2002-07-12
Posts 182Philadelphia, US |
i loved ur poem.i know it really hurts to lose love especially when they walk away without looking back.hold on my friend!tomorrw will indeed give u some comfort and keep ur heart open. |
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Rise of Truth Member
since 2003-07-12
Posts 59Beneath the Fury Sun |
Apart from some interesting deviations on spelling/grammatical conventions...i Liked it? Yeah. "Our child is in your hands |
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WinterWren Senior Member
since 2002-12-01
Posts 1044...Coming to |
I REALLY love this poem! Wow. I can relate well. I really loved the line, "so I screamed for you in my deepest thoughts." Excellent poem, and going in my library. WinterWren |
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peachesNcream Senior Member
since 2001-08-21
Posts 513Ocean Of Tears |
Mmmm...this situation seems so familiar. Anyways...this was excellent! Great write! I absolutely adore this piece! ~Jess "At the touch of love, everything becomes a poem." -Plato |
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dertah Senior Member
since 2003-06-18
Posts 584 |
ha ha, i dont think ive ever read this one before. i like it, bathing in tears and dry nakedness........ahhhhh chills roll up my spine, and i reach for jergens. really though, good ooonnnnnnnnneeeeeeeee. |
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