Teen Poetry #6 |
A man named David |
blueyedlioness Member
since 2003-04-24
Posts 289USA |
So, last night I'm depressed again, and, upset... I sit down to write. And after like, two verses of something that sounds like a rerun of half of the other stuff I've written lately, I was like... I'm boring myself, here. Why do I expect people to want to read this? So I decided to write something... different. There was a man named David Tall and thin, he was One morning he went off to work Caught the early bus His other self got up too late Missed the bus to work And once he made it to the office The boss had to be a jerk His first self got there right on time The boss gave him a raise And while he walked back to the bus stop Thought of his perfect day Other self got more depressed - His day was horrible He didn't go home at the end - Silence would be intolerable First David walked in his apartment Fixed a meal and went to bed But couldn't sleep as usual For the nothings in his head Other David went to eat At a restaurant in the town A pretty waitress smiled sweetly "Why the awful frown?" David wished with all his heart Someone would fill his life Give him purpose for tomorrow Light the lonesome nights He asked the waitress out for coffee Her name was Marie They talked and laughed and then he asked "Tomorrow are you free?" Other David was too shy Smiled back and said "Just another awful day... Could I have the check instead?" One David lies awake at home One is captured by her eyes One hides behind his menu Decides 'tween chips and fries Next morning David goes to work The same routine again And as he catches the same old bus Sees only where he's been Another remembers an awful day And a never-forgotten evening The third's so disgusted with life in general He's not going to work this morning One year later, David asks "Marie, will you be mine?" Marie says yes and friends rejoice: "It's taken enough time!" Other David walks to work Missed the early bus When he finally gets there late The boss just has to fuss Another David moved away Sits at his new desk Still not happy, still wants more For he can't be impressed This same man on one same day Found simple choices changed his life Who knew a late alarm clock Could bring him to his wife? And the difference that a brave step made - Depression or a friendly chat Could, in a second of a choice Lead down such different paths Always remember this one man And where he is today Be careful of all the little decisions For they will choose your way |
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© Copyright 2003 Laura - All Rights Reserved | |||
skyshine
since 2002-02-07
Posts 3058Beneath the northern stars |
That's great! All the little decisions I've made had such a big effect on me. I wouldn't change them for the world! Well said, Laura! P.S. Good to see you around here again. ~Elizabeth Dreams last for so long, even after you're gone... |
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SimpleDiscourse Member
since 2003-04-24
Posts 79 |
I really like the idea of people having two sides. One side being the real you and the other side being how we wished we were. All the aspects we'd like to change about ourselves. I think you portrayed that well. And it's funny when you stop and think about how every single little choice you make can drastically change your future. This was a good one. Thanks for sharing. |
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Skyfire
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381Riding |
*blink blink* okay now I'm going to go think now... you say this is different from what you usually write... maybe so, but I really like this! *plunks it in her library* It is said the Creator has taken a handful of South Wind and given each newborn Arabian the power of flight without wings |
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spritrider87 Member
since 2003-05-31
Posts 294NH |
well lets see... sounds like what i think about all the time... what i should do intsead of what iv done... always seem to make the wrong choices and want to go back... iv chosen the path of no return... stopped giving people chances... just wander alone and think about..... but i dont do anything.... just seem to hide and run... yeah im done rambeling. iamintroublebutnooneknowsitifyoucanfigureoutmymessagesthenhelpme. |
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Kandi Member
since 2000-06-14
Posts 354North of Hell |
I really liked the idea behind this...thought it was creative. I wish I could just sit down and write something like this! You did an excellent job. It made me think... ~Kay The day you were born, you were born free |
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WinterWren Senior Member
since 2002-12-01
Posts 1044...Coming to |
Woah, very thought provoking piece! I really enjoyed this one, and the message. Excellent job! WinterWren |
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OtherSideOfTheMirror Member
since 2002-12-19
Posts 245 |
you know i love your writing. This gave me a good outlook since im having a crazy bad day! thanks! ~cassi |
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dertah Senior Member
since 2003-06-18
Posts 584 |
wow. i am left utterly with no words to say but these. |
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