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Teen Poetry #6

Untitled

ShadyMakaveli
Member

since 2002-08-21

Posts 128

0 posted 2002-10-09 08:07 PM

Times have grown hard
Thoughts blurry, I worry
Growing up left me scarred
Life's moving in a hurry

Time's hands don't reset
Moving forward the only choice
The past I will never forget
Loved hearing your voice

Those were days of yesterday
Gone but not lost
The past isn't far way
Succed no matter the cost

Deep_Inside
Member

since 2002-02-14

Posts 377
i can't stop hiding

1 posted 2002-10-10 12:36 PM

i like the poem for what it desplayed to me
thanks for the read

Marshalzu

Member Elite

since 2001-02-15

Posts 2681
Lurking

2 posted 2002-10-10 08:58 AM

Ooh this is such a great write, I really enjoyed the read but if I may, could I suggest that you make the last line "no matter what the cost"?, anyway thanks for sharing

Andrew

ShadyMakaveli
Member

since 2002-08-21

Posts 128

3 posted 2002-10-10 10:27 AM

thanx for the responses, anyone else? and i like ur suggestion, i will change it to "no matter what the cost", i think that sounds better. Thanx once again.

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