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blueyedlioness
Member

since 2003-04-24

Posts 289
USA

0 posted 2003-05-16 12:47 PM

The night is dark and quiet
And you seem far away
Sometimes I am so afraid
When your focus seems to stray
And when I try to catch your eyes
And you're not looking back at me
But somewhere in the distance
I can't see

And every time I see you
Do you know how much it hurts
To have to let you go again
And try to hold you with my words?
My time is slowly running out
For what I have to say
And maybe if I speak right now
You won't turn away

If you ever need a friend
To help you through the pain
Just need someone to hold your hand
Make the monsters run away
If you're ever feeling lonely
Hurt and set apart
I'm right here beside you
Always in your heart

'Though you may forget
Turn away and hide
I promise to never leave you
I'll be by your side
And someday if you'll let me
I'll tell you the truth
And maybe you will love me back
As much as I love you

FlyingCloud
Member

since 2003-04-28

Posts 151
A little place inside my head

1 posted 2003-05-16 05:12 PM

I like the way this is done. It expresses a feeling of companionship that is needed in this world in order to make it through the darkest times.

^~^If we cannot live so as to be happy, let us least live so as to deserve it.~*~
Immanuel Hermann Fichte

Spine Grinder
Senior Member

since 2000-10-28

Posts 1127
Standing In Silence...

2 posted 2003-05-16 06:51 PM

I really liked this a lot. I can relate. Good job, and thanks for your replies on my own poems too.

If You Wanna See A Rainbow, You've Gotta Live Through The Rain. And If You Wanna See Through Love, You've Gotta Live Through The Pain.

snoduck
Member

since 2002-11-15

Posts 99
Selah, WA

3 posted 2003-05-16 07:24 PM

Spine Grinder took the words right out of my mouth... it's a very nice piece... thanks for sharing!!!!!

-Erica-

OtherSideOfTheMirror
Member

since 2002-12-19

Posts 245

4 posted 2003-05-18 03:44 PM

soooo good. Good point and good way of saying it. How do you do it!? haha I like I like... and how did you pick your username?

skyshine

Member Elite

since 2002-02-07

Posts 3058
Beneath the northern stars

5 posted 2003-05-18 04:01 PM

Laura, this is really beautiful. Doesn't everyone need a person like that? Very well done!

~Elizabeth

Dreams last for so long, even after you're gone...
~Jewel

blueyedlioness
Member

since 2003-04-24

Posts 289
USA

6 posted 2003-05-18 08:10 PM

Wow... okay, I'm feeling really good about myself right now. I needed that... thanks, you guys.

My username... my semi-boyfriend (it's a LOONNNNG story) calls me "lioness" (another long story), and I have blue eyes. So I put it all together and got... blueyedlioness!

As for how I write... I actually don't like a lot of it very much. That's sort of why I came here - to get other people's opinions on my stuff. I suppose it's kind of just what happens when I get mad or upset or happy or mushy-lovey or whatever enough to want to somehow... tell the world, ya know?

Okay... long post... sorry, y'all...

Thanks for the replies.

-Lioness

*Belabebeautiful*

Senior Member

since 2003-01-03

Posts 696
washington, USA

7 posted 2003-05-18 11:01 PM

I'm in a situation right now that relates a lot to the feelings and emotions put into this poem. It's as if this was pulled from the strings of my soul, so you can imagine that I like it a great deal! Nice work, enjoyable read
~Live and Laugh~

Always strive for excellence never perfection.
~Bella~

lilibeelee
Member

since 2001-07-12

Posts 143

8 posted 2003-05-20 08:31 PM

I liked this one alot.

BrokenDreams
Member

since 2003-02-09

Posts 425
In The Clouds

9 posted 2003-05-21 12:03 PM

This completely describes how I feel about a friend of mine. Maybe someday I'll have the guts to tell him how I feel...Anyway good write, thanks for the read.
Jenni

There are three kinds of people in this world, those who can count, and those who can't.

Local Parasite

Member Elite

since 2001-11-05

Posts 2527
Transylconia, Winnipeg

10 posted 2003-05-28 01:08 PM

I love how this is written, Laura... it's very sweet, the formatting is clever but doesn't make it too lyric... very appropriate for the subject matter of the poem.

Sounds like something you'd read in a card... I hope you gave this to whoever it was written for, it's very sweet.

Nicely done.

Parasite

Poets are the unacknowledged legislators of the world.
~Percy Bysshe Shelley

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