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frolicking dolphin
Member

since 2003-02-23

Posts 268
my own special world

0 posted 2003-02-24 10:09 PM

I'm not sure if I'm really satisfied with the way I ended this poem, but I couldn't come up with the right words to express what I wanted to say.
The warmth of your gentle light
You send from so far away
Although I sit and enjoy your tender touch
I wish I could reach up
And touch you in the very same way.

When you are mad, the breeze does blow
I feel so cold and lost.
When you are sad, I catch your tears
And wonder if you would do the same for me.

I have never really seen your eyes
Although I have looked your way
They always seem so hidden
And mine always go astray.

I always wished that I could fly
Off into the gorgeous sunset
Now that feeling is much more strong
Since I now see you in the distance.

Now I realize wings are earned
But I have never doubted myself
I will save my strength to fly your way
Off into the distance.

fearing-laughter
Senior Member

since 2001-04-24

Posts 605
land of cheese (Wisconsin)

1 posted 2003-02-24 11:06 PM

aw it is sweet, thanks for the read :-)
-bergundy-

"crack my head open, on your kitchen floor. to prove to you, that i have brains." -Alkaline Trio

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

2 posted 2003-02-25 12:05 PM

(smiles) Oh Karen, this is very heartfelt, sweet friend, you already have your wings as far as I am concerned, you just have to believe in yourself and what your heart really desires when you wake to the rising sun in the east! (big hugggssssss) God Bless You, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Karen, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

3 posted 2003-02-25 02:42 AM

It is so true isn't it that sometimes we need something to motivate us to get us going towards our goals, and I really liked the message you sent out in this poem Karen. Great work.

~* Carpe' Diem *~

Jenn Cirrincione

Member Elite

since 2000-07-02

Posts 2107
Fl

4 posted 2003-02-25 08:07 AM

I like this, very touching.

Jenn

"Now I'm convinced that he's heaven sent, and must be out of his mind- mama he's crazy, crazy over me."

Chanson
Senior Member

since 2000-08-19

Posts 1559
Up Creek w/Out Paddle

5 posted 2003-02-25 09:19 AM

I happen to like the
last paragraph, Karen.
It's not a finality
but instead it's the
beginning to something
better, a hopefulness.
I enjoyed! *s

When you think you have heard it all,
listen more closely.
~Dorene

[This message has been edited by Chanson (02-25-2003 09:20 AM).]

frolicking dolphin
Member

since 2003-02-23

Posts 268
my own special world

6 posted 2003-02-25 02:28 PM

Thank you all for your wonderful replies, it means a lot to me to know you enjoy my work.

Angel
Senior Member

since 1999-07-02

Posts 551
Pennsylvania

7 posted 2003-03-02 01:39 AM

I think the ending is perfect

.

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