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Teen Poetry #6
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Match
Member
since 2002-07-01
Posts 286
Canada Edmonton

0 posted 2003-01-30 06:58 PM



I want you to save me,
Pull me above the layer of ice i've created.
I need you to save me,
Heal my broken soul,
Kiss my frozen lips,
Warm my numbed heart.
I need you to save me,
I want you to give me that intoxicating breath.
I need you,
I want you,
But you don't.

YOUR INSULTS AND YOUR CURSES MAKE ME FEEL LIKE IM NOT A PERSON ~Staind~

© Copyright 2003 Ashley Schell - All Rights Reserved
wvplayernotreally
Member
since 2002-11-06
Posts 215
yakima wa
1 posted 2003-01-31 01:34 AM


"I need you,
I want you,
But you don't"
Sums up all of my relationships ever! Good write, simple but a good write/read

" I think I got a tan from the light in which i was basking."

AJMGW
Member
since 2002-11-19
Posts 57
Galaxy Roller Rink
2 posted 2003-01-31 12:00 PM


Simple and sweet. A lot could be said in a short time. You proved it! And for the record that sums up all of my relationships too!
AJMGW

Lexy
Senior Member
since 2003-01-28
Posts 1038
California
3 posted 2003-01-31 09:51 PM


I liked this a lot. I think the fact that it is short goes well with the subject. I used to feel like this. Like I needed someone so badly..that I was dead or incapable of happiness, but then I realized it was pointless..And that it was neccesary to inflict that much pain upon yourself. Loved the poem. Great job.
~Lexy

*Belabebeautiful*
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Senior Member
since 2003-01-03
Posts 696
washington, USA
4 posted 2003-02-01 12:39 PM


I liked this, simple, sweet and easy read and yet a huge amount of emotion behind it. Well done!

People always ask me why I don't look toward my future I tell them to many interesting things are happening today.
~Bella~

xShUgArHiGhx
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Member Elite
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs
5 posted 2003-02-04 02:04 PM


Unfortunately sometimes people arent capable of saving others the way they want them to...in no ones defense just because they arent saving you to your liking doesnt mean they arent doing all they can to save you in their own way...i completely understand how you feel..i've needed people to throw me a life line many times when all i got was a pat on the back or somethin...i hope you get saved hun

Standing on the edge of the world
Now I don’t want you to catch me
I want you to let me
Stand up here and walk on my own

Skyfire
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Member Elite
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381
Riding
6 posted 2003-02-04 07:30 PM


All I can do is this:  
vlraynes
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...
7 posted 2003-02-09 02:04 AM



Ashley~
Wow...this is quite an emotional write
and I felt every word as I read.
You've expressed this extremely well
in just a few well-chosen words.
Very nicely done.
~Vicky

"...until you have read the verse on his heart,
you have not truly met the poet.
~vlraynes

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navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #6 » Save me

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