Teen Poetry #6 |
Steel your pain.. |
Lexy Senior Member
since 2003-01-28
Posts 1038California |
Every fiber of my body begs for it. Every breath you breathe out I breath in again. I'm living off of you, your my poison. I'll drink your tears before they surface, I'll cry them through my eyes. To find but a spark to light the fire. Your the lulliby that hums softly in my ears. Things you've said I can't forget.. swarm within me, to wisk me off to sleep. I'll kill your pain before its made manifest, I'll bleed it through my skin. I'll be the best thats ever been. Every fiber of my body is yours.. I'll steel your pain, quickly.. just to see you for who you should be. |
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© Copyright 2003 Alexis Smith - All Rights Reserved | |||
Alnilam Member
since 2003-07-04
Posts 75 |
wow...i usually have something to say, but it left me speechless...really amazing. ~*Alnilam*~ |
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Skyfire
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381Riding |
I'm living off of you, your my poison. Arg I know this well... *hugs* I'm not sure what to say to this, but this is a good write, thank you for sharing with us |
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xxshadowxx Junior Member
since 2003-05-17
Posts 43Texas |
Hey that was a really really good poem great job! ~Carrie~ "Hard days made me, hard nights shaped me" |
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Song_for_Serenity Member
since 2003-05-28
Posts 97USA |
This is a great poem. I was feeling it the whole way through. I'm adding this to my library. Have a spiffy day! ~Angela |
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Kandi Member
since 2000-06-14
Posts 354North of Hell |
Sometimes all I can say is that I absolutely loved this. It was just so unique and expressive. I wouldnt change a thing about it. Excellent jpb. ~Kay Just wanna be funny,looks like the joke's on me. |
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dertah Senior Member
since 2003-06-18
Posts 584 |
very excellent job. i felt this one all the way through. |
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BrokenDreams Member
since 2003-02-09
Posts 425In The Clouds |
I know what you mean. *sigh* Nice write. -Jen |
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Obsolete Junior Member
since 2003-06-27
Posts 43 |
Ah yes, two almost becoming one. Well done. |
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Lexy Senior Member
since 2003-01-28
Posts 1038California |
This piece came to me so suddenly. And I've grown to really like it. The person its about means SO much to me, and I can't stand to see him hurting. I wish I could steel his pain if just for one moment just to see him be able to reach his full potential, to be the beautiful person I know he is, underneathe it all. Anyways..I really appreciate all of the kind replies. Thank you! Lex I'm thinking of giving this to him..what do you think?... [This message has been edited by Lexy (07-09-2003 12:34 PM).] |
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WinterWren Senior Member
since 2002-12-01
Posts 1044...Coming to |
*Pauses for a moment to find my thoughts.* This one left me speachless... I haven't recovered yet.. W O W. I love every line in here. And the end...the end is perfect. That last line holds the whole poem together, it makes a statement on it's own, but coupled with all the words above it, you have TRUE ART. WinterWren |
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Honey Member
since 2001-10-09
Posts 92Hot girl From Canada |
wow i loved this |
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Jennis#1 Member
since 2003-07-08
Posts 112IL, Usa |
Great poem. I hope to read more of your work. |
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*Belabebeautiful*
since 2003-01-03
Posts 696washington, USA |
Stunning..lovng in a twisted sort of way, I absolutly loved it! ~Live and Laugh~ The problem with resisting temptation is you never know if you'll get the chance again |
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*Belabebeautiful*
since 2003-01-03
Posts 696washington, USA |
Tiptoeing back in to add to my library .:shhhh:. don't mind me!! ~live and Laugh~ The problem with resisting temptation is you never know if you'll get the chance again |
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