Teen Poetry #6 |
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Frozen |
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devinechild22 Senior Member
since 2002-08-28
Posts 571![]() |
Ice cold Bitterness Devouring my legs Hands frostbitten Shivering body Frozen "O My love |
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© Copyright 2003 Allison Colgrove - All Rights Reserved | |||
Darkness Member
since 2002-10-17
Posts 202The place just beyond my eyes, where my spirit flies. |
For some reason I got a chill reading this. Maybe all the references to cold. Anyway this was really awesome. I think it was the perfect length. Keep it up... Push yourself to the outer reaches of your mind. Darkness |
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foreverwithyou Member
since 2002-10-20
Posts 204Wonderland |
ahhh memeber wen we were talkin about gettin ur legz cut off from frost bite!?!?!thats whut this reminded me of at first we were all like "that would suck man" this one was quite kewlish(lol) hehe hehe heh im hyper *ONK ONK* lol plumbers scare me!!! ###CATHY### "I am who I am who I am who am I?" |
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devinechild22 Senior Member
since 2002-08-28
Posts 571 |
Thank you! I wrote this bout the time I had to walk places in shorts when it was like 2 degrees out! LOL I had to pick up Chrissy and walk back to my house..Member that Cathy? That sucked man! and i kept sayin this in my head (didnt help much! LOL) *Allison* "O My love |
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PoeticGoddessOfDepression Member
since 2002-07-02
Posts 439I am everywhere |
Howdyies!! It's been awhile, right? This is awesome. It remindes me of this one time when I went to a football game and they ran out of hot chocolate, and Cathy had my gloves, and didn't give them back for like.. 3 days. *throws a drity look at cathy* Anywho, It's cool.. this is cool. Speaking of cool, mr.b is so UNcool, he put his elbow on my shoulder today and was like "sara, why don't you smile today?" and i didn't say anything and he goes "c'mon, gimme that look you always give me.. that goofy smile." and i just walked away and he went "C'MON GURL!" It was scary... in a funny way I guess. Ok, i'm going to shut up, i talk too much. ok, good poem, coolness, man! ttyl! ~sara “I make an impact on lives thru truth as well as lies. I overcome ur eyes +leave and etched memory forever. |
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dinky Member
since 2002-10-19
Posts 258 |
hey, this was really good!! i like how ur poems are different kinds, ya know?? i need to be like that too. but this was realllly good! yea, mr b. has been weird these past couple of days. anywayz...(i think sara is mad at me ![]() good poem!! ~samantha~ "sometimes i just feel like |
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
devinechild~ I have to agree with Darkness...I got cold just reading this piece, and that's a sign of good writing. You've only used a few words, but you've chosen them perfectly and done a great job of making the reader 'feel' the cold that you experienced. VERY nicely done. ![]() ~Vicky "...until you have read the verse on his heart, |
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WindSong Member
since 2002-12-23
Posts 313Long Island, New York |
I couldn't agree with you more! ~*~Kirah~*~ *Mistakes are made, you pay for them, then you do it again.* |
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devinechild22 Senior Member
since 2002-08-28
Posts 571 |
Thanks you guys. Positive feedback is always good! *Allison* "O My love |
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