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Professor Gloom
Member Elite

since 2000-07-23

Posts 3082
of Depression

0 posted 2002-08-14 08:19 AM

The half moon rose, highlighting a birds nest,
Wedged in the tree by the gate to the west,
The bird perches quietly for the night,
Removing jade hairpins it falls flowing,
In shadows watches a moth that’s flying,
Then snubs out it’s beacon of candlelight.

Gloom
Inspired by Zhang Hu "OF ONE IN THE FORBIDDEN CITY"
if you would like explanation on the original and how mine came to be,
please e-mail
and I'll send the full explanation and original translation

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

1 posted 2002-08-14 08:26 AM

Very oriental in design, Professor...
enjoying the gazing over of this one...

Professor Gloom
Member Elite

since 2000-07-23

Posts 3082
of Depression

2 posted 2002-08-14 08:34 AM

Thank you, Sunshine,
That was my hope, that my words could reflect
The beauty of the words from this Chinese Master Poet.
Pleased you enjoyed.

Gloom

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

3 posted 2002-08-14 09:18 PM

I enjoyed this immensely. It has a definite oriental feel to it, and the imagery is vivid.

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

4 posted 2002-08-14 09:25 PM

Night Lie

crescent moon on high
indigo wrapped stars in sky
flaming hues, breathe sigh

the moon sure is beautiful these past few nights...I watch from my window to see its bright glow.

Professor Gloom
Member Elite

since 2000-07-23

Posts 3082
of Depression

5 posted 2002-08-14 09:53 PM

Thank you, Midnitesun,
Pleased you enjoyed it

Thank you, Nakdthoughts,
Sometimes see just part of the whole beauty
Makes one appreciate that which is not seen more.
I always watch the moon when I’m able
Through all the phases
Glad you liked my effort.

Gloom

redheart angrybraids
Member

since 2000-04-16

Posts 410
honolulu, hawaii

6 posted 2002-08-24 06:37 AM

i love this poem

Kindly,
Redheart Angrybraids

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius

since 1999-07-05

Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA

7 posted 2002-08-24 12:37 PM

PG....there's such a demand out there for poetry translations....get these things out there.

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