Open Poetry #22 |
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Thunderhead (Iambe) |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn ![]() |
I had just finished up the front porch Replacing the broken, worn and rotted boards that I had crossed a couple million times seemingly, without looking down When she drove up the long dirt track just ahead of the great plume of talc-fine dust that was trying to catch Georges, old pick-up. I thought I noticed her normally relaxed features taut, fixed, behind that cracked and dirty windscreen But her smile, when she walked over to me was still Iambe Gesturing, with one of the cold ones she carried, said, “You're never gonna get a good woman to move in there with you, yanno?” “Hmmph”, my reply She handed me one of the longnecks and settled beside me on the new wood, her back against the shack heels to butt Drank, sighed, and gazed at the great black thunderhead that was giving someone hell in the next county I lit a smoke and watched her watching that storm build And I wondered as I looked deeper into her just who in THIS county would the storm I saw THERE be giving hell to ~wranx *saying that she must not go quietly* In reply to "which way do we go?", the answer was never "straight", but, "progressively forward". |
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© Copyright 2002 E.F.Rose - All Rights Reserved | |||
Cpat Hair![]()
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Bravo!!!! Wranx.... you indeed captured her and I look forward to seeing what your perspective from here adds to the series as well as the character. I could have done this no better.... and I certainly could not have added the touches you have to her saga... [This message has been edited by Cpat Hair (10-10-2002 11:25 AM).] |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
Thank you Ron I shall try to do this.....creation, some justice. I appreciate your support in this new endeavor. ~Ed |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I feel like I have just seen a torch pass. Ed, you do her justice--and I applaud, as you have the "voice" that adds to her, it's "just right" writing--and I feel MUCH better now. ![]() |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Konrad is nodding...you've caught up his sister's fury, all in one tempest... well done... |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
Thanks Karen, But I feel if Iambe is to be with me, it will be HER choice. I will continue my attempts to gain her trust. Kari, My thanks to you and Konrad ~Ed |
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Tiersdin Member Elite
since 2000-11-17
Posts 2364east coast |
Bravo, Wranx... *smiles* ~Tier ![]() "I shall never bond again, as I have bonded with you..." |
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brian sites Senior Member
since 2002-06-25
Posts 1475usa |
I hope Ron is smiling for his left is now your right, Ed and I'd hate to be caught in THAT storm well done, Wranx b |
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bsquirrel![]()
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
The beginning clouds of a giant anvil monster mushrooming in the sky, perhaps? Even if not, even if this is but a one-off, I'm glad you wrote it, Ed. Raincomedown |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Heh. Still enjoying!... ![]() |
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