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Rain and ice cream
| Open Poetry #22 |
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Rain and ice cream |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855
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Rain picked apart the strawberry scoop left to pinken the tar, a watery face. Little fingers, rain is little fingers you said, and pushed me off, grabbed me in to show what you'd meant. The push, so I fell from the bench and almost the curb. The pull, eager strength back up, the picked sparks of your eyes. (the glass swimming pictures, the hard and cold spaces, the tobacco-less smoke achieving your breath) This gesture, where you smoothed my hair to let drops down your fingers, my hand, ice-cream cold to your face, the taste of lips, as thunder roared and transferred its low call to a bus's open door, motor rhythm our idling. [This message has been edited by bsquirrel (09-24-2002 01:58 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2002 MPC - All Rights Reserved | |||
Android 17
since 2001-07-21
Posts 664Winnipeg |
Heh-heh...rain and icecream!  I like the poem adaption to your "most romantic" moment... (thread in The Lounge) Nicely done! Very descriptive!But with the bad comes the good---although descriptive...I don't know if it's the state of mind I'm in, but I found this hard to read! Hmmmm...I'll try reading it later! Okai? All I do, is think about you... |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Actually, Android 17, I'm being a bit deceptive. The "rain and ice cream" moment with Lori was actually spending the whole week with her (it began with ice cream, ended with rain). However, I wanted to write a "coulda happened" moment while I was in Calgary, so that's what this is. Much like "A kiss (tears and sadness optional)" is all about Lori, but that never happened, either. The feelings, though, are quite real. (and you thought my poetry's hard to read -- good luck making it through this convoluted message )[This message has been edited by bsquirrel (09-24-2002 03:00 PM).] |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
deceptive? I dunno 'bout that, just complex...maybe deep. I find it hard to read through squirrel's poems sometimes, what I call "mood poetry", but once the meaning comes through, whatever way the reader sees the meaning, it's simply awesome! |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
 Why, thank you, passing shadows.I'm not sure this is deep -- just there. |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
I like it Mikey! Let my own mind wander.... I enjoy coming up with my own interpretation. ~Hugs~ ~ Time has cast a spell on you |
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Nightshade
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
Mikey - this reminds me of that old song, MacCarther's Park. (spell?) "Someone left the cake out in the rain" cake - ice cream - ice cream and cake....rain....oh well. I did enjoy this write though. Your wording is always great. Chris Life is not measured by breaths you take, but by moments that take your breath away. |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
..."the taste of lips as thunder roared..." ---the height of erotica for this earthy angel! EA |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
MacArthur's Park, indeed... This is a writing well worth a read or three, at various times of day...sure to lead one's imagination on a foray all of its own... well done, young man! |
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Tiersdin Member Elite
since 2000-11-17
Posts 2364east coast |
Enjoyed this Mikey... ~Tier "I shall never bond again, as I have bonded with you..." |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Thank you all. And great to see you here, Tier.Mikey C'mon, baby, c'mon darling, Let me steal this moment from you now. C'mon, angel, c'mon, c'mon, darling, Let's exchange the experience. -K.B. [This message has been edited by bsquirrel (09-24-2002 03:53 PM).] |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
I like that MacArthur's park interpretation too... But Mr.Squirrel's poetry isn't really hard to read... One just has to slip into the right framework and then it becomes beautifully clear and beautifully written too.  ~ poetic rodent hugsLyra |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
"MacArthur's Park is melting in the dark.. all the think green icing flowing down.. Someone left the cake out in the rain... And I don't think that I can take it.. cause it took so long to make it.... And I'll never have that recipe again" Now see what my sister has gone and done to me...!!?? LOL...sorry Mikey....now that song is stuck in my head...(sister's fault) Still love this poem!! |
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Anvrill Senior Member
since 2002-06-21
Posts 710in the interzone now |
Just hafta jump in and say this... (Yes, this may mean I'm slowly comin' back. I saw a lady walking her ferret the other day, and I went up to say hi, and the ferret was the sweetest little thing, with strong and dark badger markings. Hard to believe Fidge was ever that small.) No matter how deceptive this is... Whether or not it happened... It's just as true as anything you could write, because it's true to us. And I will now not rest until I actually do shove you off a bus bench. You set yourself up for that one.Love you immensely. More than. Too much, sometimes, but hey, a girl's allowed, right? I'd gladly get locked outta the house all night again, if it was with you. Trudge up Glenmore, and crash at that fancy hotel for one night. We could scrounge up the money somewhere. Though I prefer cold, wet and miserable days when they're day. Cold, wet and miserable nights can kindly mind their own business and die, especially when I'm caught in 'em.I'm gonna try to get back on track, k, babe? New job, new phase of life. Still miss Fidgey horribly, but it's the sad ache, not the breaking ooginess. Y've gotta see something I did in class... Once I get all the pics set right. I need Dreamweaver. You'll see why. I need $150, so I can get Dreamweaver... (This is half off; student pricing. I'm spoiled.) Love you. *kiss* I repeat, that this does not mean I'm back. your tongue's like poison |
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Anvrill Senior Member
since 2002-06-21
Posts 710in the interzone now |
Jus' maybe.your tongue's like poison |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Madame, Thanks for your sweet essay In Defence of Poesy. Oh wait, you never wrote that? Hmm... Well, thank you for defending my poem. It really means a lot. I've just kinda gotten shruggy about people gettin' me or not. I'm glad you understand.Acorns all around! Enchantress, Strangely, I now have Scarborough Fair in my head! Heeeeeelp! Lori, What a great way to show yr back -- I'm glad this is the poem that gotcha out of hiding for a bit. I love you, Lori. Calgary is close. We're closer. *kiss* I'll save yr message and write you an e-mail sometime in the next few days, k? C'mon, baby, c'mon darling, |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (smiles) Wow, oh my gosh, I too had that MacArthur's Park dialogue running through my head and rewinding and playing again reading this, wow, this proves you interpret so wonderfully something that strikes chords to the reader, I LOVE IT, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Michael, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Krishankins
since 2002-06-23
Posts 972Texas |
This reminds me of dreams not yet dreamed, Mike. I enjoyed it very much!! Hey dog, did you see the size of that chicken!? |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Thank you both. |
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