»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #22
»
My Diamond
| Open Poetry #22 |
|
My Diamond |
|
|
BlueEyes Member
since 2002-08-30
Posts 152TX, USA |
This definitely not my greatest.. Just random thoughts floating around in this head of mine..(I think my muse is on summer vacation)... He gave me a diamond, The day we united. It was as bright as the brightest star in our city sky I loved him endlessly For ten long years And my love never dimmed, still as bright as my diamond We were blessed with children Four kids that make me proud My diamond still as bright as the sun on their faces… Things grew bad And then they got worse But still my love held on, shining as bright as ever I tried to hold on, But the pain proved too much Too many tears had left it tarnished… The bruises healed, But my heart did not. For on this day, my diamond lost its shine. |
||
| © Copyright 2002 Tera - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
ThisDiamond Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353Michigan, USA |
For random thoughts, this progressive pain was expressed very well. ThisDiamond |
||
|
Magician Member
since 2002-08-14
Posts 126 |
I love this. |
||
|
Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
This is what I'd call a "raw, real write"----you spoke from your heart---lay yourself bare and let the reader in. Take Care EA |
||
|
the_loner_23 Member Ascendant
since 2002-06-08
Posts 5479Jacksonville, Florida, USA |
Awesome poem Cold hands means a warm heart |
||
|
ThunderMage Senior Member
since 2002-06-20
Posts 812Canada |
Yea, that was good. What is life without poetry and adventure? |
||
Interloper
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369Deep in the heart |
I'd say those were much better than rondom thoughts. I'd really like to see what happens when your muse inspires once again  Fool, said my Muse to me, look in thy heart and write. |
||
|
BlueEyes Member
since 2002-08-30
Posts 152TX, USA |
Thank you all for taking the time to reply... It means alot when you look and that "0" has disappeared & a number has taken it's place ! (Yea!  )As for the poem...it was not thought out very well, when I go back in I see the mistakes in the rhythm... but it was from the heart...so I guess in that case iambic meter doesn't matter too much... Good thing is, I'm only 24 (yes, 24 years old with 4 babies... ) So there is still hope... Hopefully...Again, thanks to all who replied... |
||
|
jwesley Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563Spring, Texas |
Me I don't know about all that other stuff you talked about in your comment above, you know, that iambic thingamajig and all, but 24 I know, wonderful writing I know, 4 kids I don't know - whew! Always enjoy you my friend...always, even when you're "rambling". jwesley |
||
|
Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
BlueEyes - well written thoughts for just a mind that was rambling. |
||
Mistletoe Angel 
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (big hugggssssss) Oh Tera, I hope these thoughts don't relate to you now, sweet friend, my heart goes out to you and hope now the diamonds of your dreams shimmer, God Bless You, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Tera, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
