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Open Poetry #22

Song 1

Hopeless Romantic
Junior Member

since 2002-05-22

Posts 27

0 posted 2002-09-13 10:11 PM

Song 1

The night sky is out
The stars are shining bright
No friends to call on
I'm all alone tonight

And the baby cries
And the lights go dim
Death is knocking on my door
Should I let him in

The world is caveing in
The pressure is on my back
The only way to realive the pain
Is with a shiny silver blade

And the baby cries
And the lights go dim
Death is knocking on my door
Should I let him in
Should I let him in
I might let him in

The birds are singing there songs
They always fly around
But if I was a bird
I'd fly Away

And the baby cries
And the lights go dim
Death is knocking on my door
Should I let him in
I might let him in
I think I'll let him in
I just let him in

Pilgrimage
Member Elite

since 2001-12-04

Posts 3945
Texas, USA

1 posted 2002-09-13 10:15 PM

Whoa! That's great, I love the repetition and the ending is superb! But conduct him back out, please, he's getting dirt on the carpet.

Nan(Pilgrim variety)

the_loner_23
Member Ascendant

since 2002-06-08

Posts 5479
Jacksonville, Florida, USA

2 posted 2002-09-13 10:25 PM

I loved it

Cold hands means a warm heart

TradingSpaces19
Member

since 2002-08-31

Posts 134
Arvada, Colorado

3 posted 2002-09-13 10:26 PM

That is so sad. (big hugs) It made me cry. I am here if you ever want to talk TradingSpaces19@hotmail.com. thanx for sharing.

Andrea

Hopeless Romantic
Junior Member

since 2002-05-22

Posts 27

4 posted 2002-09-14 01:48 AM

Thanks u guys its ur comments that got me writing again.

Neala
Member

since 1999-08-21

Posts 262
Florida, USA

5 posted 2002-09-16 10:12 PM

Matt I loved it...not sure what made you write it...put good. Love ya,
Neala

Bill Charles
Member Patricius

since 2000-07-11

Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now

6 posted 2002-09-16 10:31 PM

Hopeless Romantic - I could feel your thoughts reading this, but please show him the door...

BC

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