Open Poetry #22 |
Entering The Garden Gate |
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I had to lift the gate to enter-- it dragged ragged on the ground held by half a screw on hinge-- the rot of wood made not a sound as I held the door aloft amazed there was no hindrance there I turned and placed it with much thought imagining a coat of care. I saw a winding path ahead overgrown with four o clocks the brick was moldy in thier bed parslane held hands--interlocked Egyptian sage grew wild in bloom Hawaiian ginger boasted soon rule of garden in perfume... behold the braid of bud's cocoon. Butterflies in kiss of me dance to bass of bumblebee I spied a sundial in the weeds the ancient brought me to my knees pulling grass by the handful wishing sun would shadow dial... I pulled the last grasp of the grass and then the sun burst through in smile. He played upon a wing of time casting shadow in the rust silent darkness rang the chime-- and I, the ash, returned to dust. |
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© Copyright 2002 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved | |||
Paul Wilson
since 2002-07-07
Posts 4711United States |
serenity...What a wonderful journey through a once forgotten place you have taken me on.This one will be put in my library...Paul |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Not! what I expected, but as always a surprise, it was more....the imagery... at first I thought I was reading free verse, but it rhymed, then it was prose, in free verse, rhyming... dang...it was a after all... |
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Tracey Member Elite
since 2001-08-29
Posts 2808where insanity meets breeding |
Very cool imagery in this Karen. I could almost smell the scene. Love that last stanza, unexpected, yet fitting. You can never win or lose |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Ah! I really liked this one... I, the gust, return to rest Regards , Sudhir |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
damn ............ Who knew Monet could rhyme this is stunning me twin... cadence and imagery...stunning and superb |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Serenity, He played upon a wing of time casting shadow in the rust silent darkness rang the chime-- and I, the ash, returned to dust. Wonderful. |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
ahh the imagery K, the imagery! Excellent as always m'dear luscious one |
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Nightshade
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
serenity - this is soooo good. I really enjoyed every word, and it is going into my library. Chris Life is not measured by breaths you take, but by moments that take your breath away. |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
The whole poem was extraordinary, Karen... But that last verse... Totally unexpected but the perfect crowning to the poem... ~ hugs from a chipmunk in the garden Lyra |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
This is now one of personal favourites of your poems! I suppose that's a good indication that I like it very much! Linda |
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brian sites Senior Member
since 2002-06-25
Posts 1475usa |
breathtaking... lady, your mind is the center of the SUN changing mere hydrogenthought to helium RAPTURE filling THIS person and floating me on my day awed brian |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
serenity at first I thought you had been visiting in my backyard...but this place of poem is more awesome, and made so because of you. |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Sen, You are of yr write. Mike |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Butterflies in kiss of me dance to bass of bumblebee I spied a sundial in the weeds the ancient brought me to my knees pulling grass by the handful wishing sun would shadow dial... I pulled the last grasp of the grass and then the sun burst through in smile. ------------------------------------------ Karen...this piece is amazing!! I especially liked the above stanza... Incredible piece of work here. ~Hugs YOU~ ~ Time has cast a spell on you |
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Suetang Member Ascendant
since 2001-03-07
Posts 5187Melbourne, Australia |
Hello Karen The title drew me in and your words took me on a wonderful journey through an amazing garden. I could smell the fragrance of the blooms and felt the sun on my back. I hope all is well with you. Take care.....Sue I am in motion |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
every now and then, I lose time when I write and journey to some place lovely, and mostly feel inadequate when trying to describe the view... I so appreciate you all "seeing" this place with me....I very very humbly thank you for your kindness--and appreciate the company. Thank you. |
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