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Open Poetry #21
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| Open Poetry #21 |
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tattoos |
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diversion New Member
since 2002-06-04
Posts 3 |
if all mistakes made were etched ink to skin the culpable curls carved along my own curves: black crescents child carving rock, wood each betrayal, malicious performance; all lies in and out; pain pushed in for pleasure; and darker secrets: crime of mind and desire, in detail black and manifest… I might feel less a thief for this light attention: small invitations into your familiar, taciturn intrusion to your clandestine common spaces the almost pang of guilt: how every while with you is comfortable, warm better to scrape my heart out to its skin, feed the filth to you, make you swallow before you grant me kindness, esteem, some soft slide of affection review before reception the sickness in my head and this pitiable attachment how I jump to your attention pace till you get home but smile and swallow pretend indifference keep busy, keep my pride and it is not the black unwelcome cavity that hollows a soul instead, the sweeter simmer of a discovered desired; child-ache for a favorite friend I would love to believe I am unemotionally involved but I know too the wash of girl-silly infatuation what warms me over recalling your hand on my shoulder as if it belonged the kiss of knees sigh, also: the worry that I’ll make connections that are not there how hard it is not to sling one leg over touch your face trace one vein follow thigh to hip and swallow sometimes I would love to believe I have fallen far beyond the point of saving that this is less loneliness than a sense of underlying oneness I don’t want to confuse and I want to give you every desperate invisible scar safety, I think as if a warning could rescue you from me as if words could keep the thought out of your head: “I don’t need rescuing” oh, but that’s presumption and I don’t need to say this either or all of it but want to and as long as that’s so… then I’ll give it and as long as it’s taken… that’s enough. [This message has been edited by diversion (06-25-2002 05:31 AM).] |
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| © Copyright 2002 diversion - All Rights Reserved | |||
Ladycat 
since 1999-07-05
Posts 782At the edge and a doorway,TX |
That is a song. I'm sure of it. That piece was long and I loved every minute of it. I just couldn't stop readin it. I enjoyed it and it made me think for awhile and I'll still be thinking about this piece tomarrow. I really think that you should make that into a song and see what kind of response that you get. Great read here. Welcome. Take your shoes off and stay awhile. Love, Ladycat Live in my world just once and you'll find yourself enraptured. |
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Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL |
wonderfully done...there is something very real here. I will be looking for more of your work. How grave is my condition, for I cannot find the words to say, I need you so. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
A writer...Welcome to Passions! Please, check your E-mail for a Special Greeting! Karilea |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
and as long as that’s so… then I’ll give it and as long as it’s taken… that’s enough. incredible writing, I hope you enjoy your stay at Passions and WELCOME Enjoy life, this is NOT a dress rehearsal. |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
Very nice write.....yanno?...I saw this tatoo once on this gal [edited by Moderator] [This message has been edited by Sunshine (06-25-2002 11:51 AM).] |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Welcome to Passions... Incredible write here! I look forward to more of your work.. ~Hugs, Nancy~ ~Somewhere in my heart I'm always |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
diversion Yes, intense and very well done...welcome to Passions! |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
Diversion, Welcome to Passions. I can see by this post that you are a welcomed talent to this forum. Indeed, if most of us wore tattoos for every mistake we've made, we'd be covered from head to toe. Lord knows, I'd hate that, since (as at least one other poet here knows), I wouldn't be caught dead wearing a tattoo. I like them on men, though. Looking forward to reading more of your work. Corinne |
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RosePetal
since 2001-08-26
Posts 2985South Florida |
I enjoyed your poem! WELCOME to poetry land! Please check your e mail for a special greeting from me. |
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Interloper
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369Deep in the heart |
Welcome to Passions. Fool, said my Muse to me, look in thy heart and write. |
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paladin
since 2001-08-05
Posts 930Pensacola,Fl. |
I add my welcome to passions.Excellent start.Looking forward to more. paladin |
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jellybeans Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298 |
if all mistakes made were etched ink to skin what a write, made me look down and imagine what my skin would show..... incredible write.....very nice....*shakes her head*...gonna save this and reread... |
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devina Member Elite
since 1999-10-28
Posts 3539Cali |
Giving you the breathless welcome you deserve here!!! This was fabulous...your use of emotion, word play, and contrast, NOT to mention imagery!!! how hard it is not to sling one leg over touch your face trace one vein follow thigh to hip and swallow *If* I had to pick a favorite...this would be it!!! Take care!! Devina Open arms can be the most fragile in the world... |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Wow! Welcome! Don't stop!  These smiling eyes are just a mirror for the sun. |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
  YAY!!! Oh my gosh, this is such a powerful debut, I love it, we all make mistakes but they can be corrected if we take the proper precautions, I love it!!! Welcome to Passions, sweet friend, may you be inspired by all of us here as we will all be inspired by your lovely words! (smiles) I can't wait to read more of your lovely words, we all love you so much! Ooohhhhh...and please check your e-mail for a special greeting from all of us here at Passions! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet friend, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
diversion First welcome and second with writing like this you will have a large audience, enjoyed. |
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texasrose Member
since 2001-10-24
Posts 146 |
Yes! Welcome. Excellent |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
didja notice that "invisible" ink I used I my reply up yonder?....hmmm...me thinks nan's been busy....LOL |
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