Open Poetry #21 |
The Boon |
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
The Boon Lowered the point of egos lance My horse charged in reckless prance Ran right through the ambergris Pierced it through its girths obese. Then rode on through the hidden Braille Where light lit up a greener trail And read the signs as best I could The little more I understood. But phantoms are a hearty breed And grow a very hearty seed. They are the locks upon our door That opens into evermore. The keys are hidden out of sight Sometimes found a summers night But time assays in sliding sand That slips your fingers though your hand. So therefore we impel of time To ring the bell another chime |
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© Copyright 2002 Seymour Tabin - All Rights Reserved | |||
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
One more, one more, implore, implore, and till the chime is but silent bell I'll dream this is heaven but if not, never tell... Bravo, Sy |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Sunshine, Thank you for the sweet comment and bravo. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Ran right through the ambergris Pierced it through its girths obese Then rode on through the hidden Braille ================================== But phantoms are a hearty breed And grow a very hearty seed. =================================== The keys are hidden out of sight Sometimes found a summers night But time assays in sliding sand That slips your fingers though your hand. So therefore we impel of time To ring the bell another chime ===================================== Well I just woke the whole house up yelling at the screen...HE WRITES SO COOL!!! You are me king of metaphor and vocabulary Stinky...look at all the sybolism and personification...look at all rhymes divine and poetic phrasing and word play... Ran right through the ambergris Pierced it through its girths obese But time assays in sliding sand That slips your fingers though your hand. and those will be my waaaay cool line and images for the day. I dont know about lowering no boon... I just kknow you hang the moon |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
JM, If I recieve no other answers but yours I am happy. You pick up every nuance, implication and shading that I write and infer. There are not many that do. So you can understand if I have an infinity for the butterfly that I see. Winkiewinkie Randy Stinky |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Seymour~ I would not pretend to know HOW you do it ... but I'm soooooooo glad you do~ 'Then rode on through the hidden Braille Where light lit up a greener trail And read the signs as best I could The little more I understood.' You always seem to 'see more'~ Thank you for letting me peek~ *Hugs* ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Marge, You can peek anytime. |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Hey Sy I like these lines best That slips your fingers though your hand" |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Nan, Hi sweety missed you. |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
oooh oooh ooooh My favorite lines are the "phantom" one and the final two lines. Nice piece! Whether on the shoal or on the shore, |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
The keys are hidden out of sight Sometimes found a summers night But time assays in sliding sand That slips your fingers though your hand. I love this poem, Sy...and I sure hope that the keys to time are hidden out of sight. ~ timeless hugs Lyra |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
VAS, Thank you dear. Lyra, Love and hugs back. |
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Greeneyes
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
This is amazing SY~ always a pleasure.... Lauren~ The ocean looks like a thousand diamonds strewn across a blue blanket |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
You have such a gift of cadence mixed with metaphor magic that it is hard to imagine what it would take to catch up to you in talent. You make is all seem so effortless in all you write and in this piece you gave us some lines that shall endure the test of time for sure. ie... Ran right through the ambergris Pierced it through its girths obese. ******** But time assays in sliding sand That slips your fingers though your hand ******** So therefore we impel of time To ring the bell another chime ******** Now that is poetry folks. |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Sy I'm sure you're paint is artist too, but first you are a poet true!! Wonderful! |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
(smiles) Oh Seymour, this is wonderful, sweet friend, and knowing that these keys exist there is a promise just awaiting on that otherside that is more than transparent! (big hugggssssss) This is fabulous, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Seymour, thank ou for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Marsha
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Seymour darling heart, do you miss me as I flit in then flit out? Probably not but you know you tie me to this place as only a few others do, and when I haven’t been in for a few days, as I haven’t, I hasten to read your latest gem. And when I do I’m captivated once more, you nuances hold the fillip of truth your phrasing is as perfect as perfect can be. I don’t know how you do it I only know you do. And I kneel at the feet of the Sultan of rhyme, and pay you my due homage. Stroke your nuance of delight o’re my mind Let me wander in the glades of dragon’s find Brush my face with the tip of wordy delight Then dance with me until the eve of night Breathe the words of poetic voice to me Let me roam over your poet’s soul dreamily Take me to that place once more my friend Then leave me in the poem until time does end I’ll dance the steps of wonder in your glade Wrap myself in wisps of dreamer’s nightly shade Trip over the threshold of your mind’s dare Wander in places neither here nor there If you’ll whisper the words of your poet’s voice Offer me reasons and plenty of choice If you gift me again with the breath of this The delicate touch of your poetic kiss Marsha I love this one Seymour my friend it is an absolutely beauty I love it utterly utterly utterly Love and warm stuff As always Mushy Breathe through the heat of our desire |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Lauren, You are the amazing one, thank you dear. Mark, If you weren't such a good poet, I'd have second thoughts but your talent is beyond question and so I can only humbly thank you amigo. Martie, Noah, You are a good friend and a good poet, thank you. Marsha, You leave me speechless. |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Sy, I know I am late for my morning read... but this is just as fantastic at bedtime too. Wonderful write love. ~Hugs~ |
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