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Open Poetry #20
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To Seek Living Water--poem I'm working on-suggestions?
| Open Poetry #20 |
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To Seek Living Water--poem I'm working on-suggestions? |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
To Seek Living Water Trickles sang in my ears as the warm sand caressed my every step, the pain eating at my heart, tearing at my stomach, had already begun to ease. Wings fluttered, a raven was leaving; finches and sparrows, sparrows! were alighting in the willow branches dangling gently in the breeze. I placed my hand upon the stone lowered myself onto the sand, gentle ripples lapped at my toes and knees. I knelt there, the living in the water coaxed me to renewal; assured me life was here. I spoke, silently, from my heart, from my soul- then listened. Quiet, save for gentle chatter, of bird song, chortling above me, a hum of bumble droned a calming. All was a tender whisper speaking love, loving me, with heartening. A freshening of tears caressed my cheeks, a trickling of living water sang my cares, fears away. A prayer of the spirit from groanings deep within me, words I did not understand, inaudible, yet they released pain and anguish. As agony’s mute lifted, sparrow’s song reached the very core of me, finch’s chirping bubbled my spirit to effervescence. I could rise again, I stepped into the stream, felt a call to enter fully into the blessings awaiting. The cool water rushed around me as my submerging spun it about. As I reached complete immersion, the cool, cleansing power brought life to my thinking. Rising from the stream, pain and fear dripped completely away, flowed downstream. Stepping from the water, I found even the sand felt more solid, more grounded, as did I. ©April 22, 2002 Whether on the shoal or on the shore, I'll seek the lighthouse evermore. [This message has been edited by VAS (04-22-2002 05:23 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2002 Virginia Salter - All Rights Reserved | |||
catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
I like it as is, and I think it has a very powerful feeling. Sandra |
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ThisDiamond Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353Michigan, USA |
Magnificent! If this is a work in the works, I shall read you on the billboards! There is something about the healing power of nature that is amazing and you have touched on a subject that I can embrace completely. Thank you for sharing this with us. ThisDiamond |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
Okay Virginia, Was this a trick question? I can't find where it could be improved! Excellent metaphor so well developed and presented. I can't begin to write like this. Nice job.  It's never too late to have a good childhood! Woohoo! |
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