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Open Poetry #20
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Tragic Gods
| Open Poetry #20 |
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Tragic Gods |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
If I pondered on the soul of us And found the cosmic gods To be jokers Playing with each like bored children Will in tend do when rain keeps Indoors the active And on such days they with disregard For longevity of idea or attention Do build a fantasy that collapses When the sun would dry ground And again they might pursue The run of leg or stretch of arm Leaving behind the world built From their malaise Would I still believe in you Or you in me? Perhaps such philosophy examined In must of antiquity led to legends Explaining why fates conspired in ego torn ways To undo all the affairs of heart and honor Leaving love to struggle in odds or evens With each roll or toss of divine will Until even the stars weep mourning loss And we Mere mortals that we are Gamble hearts Not knowing the dice are loaded Still believing in us |
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| © Copyright 2002 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Ron "Until even the stars weep mourning loss And we Mere mortals that we are Gamble hearts Not knowing the dice are loaded Still believing in us" Much deep thought in this, my friend...made my heart ache. Very well done!! |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Cpat, how interesting! As I began the first stanza, the read was slow and then the words galloped away... second stanza, same thing...it starts slow, builds dramatically as if you cannot say it all fast enough... then you bring me back to measured beat of word... Very good...Very very good... |
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Marsha
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Ron darling boy shall I just say something short like this is good writing? Noooooooooooo of course not, because it’s not good writing, it’s stunningly fabulous writing. YOU are a superb writer my friend. Fabulous writing and the language usage in it is stunning, a deep and meaningful piece with much to ponder in the soul Absolutely excellent    Love and warm stuff As always Mushy To give light to them that sit in darkness..... to guide our feet into the way of peace Luke 2:79 |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Perhaps such philosophy examined In must of antiquity led to legends Explaining why fates conspired in ego torn ways To undo all the affairs of heart and honor Leaving love to struggle in odds or evens With each roll or toss of divine will Until even the stars weep mourning loss And we Mere mortals that we are ================================= that verse is pure magic...the images, the metaphors, personification, phrasing, Pure Poetry ... Classic Capt.  |
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Mistletoe Angel 
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (smiles) WOW!!! Yes, I too love the "galloping effect" of this verse, it is incredible and well details your thoughts! (big hugggssssss) We are all indeed flesh and blood but we can always become our own heroes as long as we believe in ourselves and find a way to overshadow our fears, which can always prove to be the tragic downfall of a character! (sigh) This is wonderful, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Ron, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton |
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Zinsser Senior Member
since 2001-02-27
Posts 1641Calif. |
The whole write is wonderful I'm with Martie on my favs What a concept... ~~ Connie ~~ |
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rwood Member Elite
since 2000-02-29
Posts 3793Tennessee |
And we Mere mortals that we are Gamble hearts Not knowing the dice are loaded Still believing in us I am just so happy, so thankful that mine still beats its wild and rolling beat. Call me crazy..but sane enough to know this is great poetry...hugs! Sincerely, Regina |
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Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
And on such days they with disregard For longevity of idea or attention Do build a fantasy that collapses When the sun would dry ground I often imagine the gods having a good laugh over some of the emotional Disneylands I've dreamt up. Great write, Ron. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I love it all, but the first line endeared me to you once again. The soul of us... nice. And the rest was like licking the bowl. |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Captain, may I just say...FANTASTIC!!... ~Somewhere in my heart I'm always |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
This spoke to the very depths of me and drew forth memories of hope and anticipation stopped in their tracks by "can't be"s and "why"s... and the eventual acceptance that "what is" is an incredible gift to be treasured, regardless of what can never be. *S* I like this very much, Cpat. *S* |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
Very thought provoking work, Cpat. What else can we do but hope? Cor |
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