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bags123
Member

since 2002-06-06

Posts 128

0 posted 2002-06-06 05:13 PM

     BELOW

From the bridge
I watch the river's
twilight waters flow
Sure destination
uncompromised
by the creeping
timid fog

     ABOVE

Gas demon's
light casting shadows
on skeleton steel
Oblivion's steeds
rescuing their
precious minutes
homeward bound

      BELOW

Velvet mud
pushed on silently
by omniscient tides
skirting ancient isle's
undaunted by
mans concrete
obstacles

      ABOVE

Cruel cables
harnessing heaven
a cosmic attempt
imitating God
The river chortles
at our finite
impudence

[This message has been edited by bags123 (06-06-2002 05:30 PM).]

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

1 posted 2002-06-06 05:24 PM

Your words paint vivid pictures, bags. *S* I like this... welcome to Passions! *S*

Tiersdin
Member Elite

since 2000-11-17

Posts 2364
east coast

2 posted 2002-06-06 05:26 PM

Enjoyed reading, looking forward to more...

welcome,
~R.T.

"I shall never bond again, as I have bonded with you..."

EarthenSoul
Member

since 2002-05-30

Posts 163
WA, USA

3 posted 2002-06-06 05:29 PM

Great contrast. Look forward to future writes.

Magnus

Member Laureate

since 2001-10-10

Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

4 posted 2002-06-06 05:30 PM

Like this...very descriptive...easy to see
the images you paint with your pen..

Welcome to Passions..

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

5 posted 2002-06-06 05:32 PM

Welcome to Passions! I'm going to like learning from you...Please, check your E-mail for a Special Greeting!

Karilea
If I whisper, will you listen?...
I would rather be silent and write, than speak loudly and be bound.

bags123
Member

since 2002-06-06

Posts 128

6 posted 2002-06-06 05:39 PM

Thank you all for the kind response. Looking forward to checking your respective poetic heads as well. Peace

Severn
Member Rara Avis

since 1999-07-17

Posts 7704

7 posted 2002-06-06 06:27 PM

welcome to passions...

quite remarkable poetry, distinctive style...made me think, which is always a good thing..

this especially:

Velvet mud
pushed on silently
by omniscient tides
skirting ancient isle's
undaunted by
mans concrete
obstacles

K

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

8 posted 2002-06-06 07:10 PM

WELCOME TO PASSIONS!
Very very interesting first post!
I look forward to more of your work.
~Hugs, Nancy~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
dancing with you in the summer rain~

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

9 posted 2002-06-06 07:46 PM

BRAVO!!! Oh my gosh, this is so sad but such a powerful debut, sweet friend, I LOVE IT!!! (BIG HUGGGSSSSS) Welcome to Passions, sweet friend, may you be inspired by all of us here as we will all be inspired by your lovely words! (sigh) I can't wait to read more of your lovely words, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet friend, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

bags123
Member

since 2002-06-06

Posts 128

10 posted 2002-06-06 10:35 PM

Thanks...eh...I didn't think it was that good. Hugs and kisses back at you...I guess.

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