Open Poetry #20 |
The truth of fairytales |
Cirrus Member
since 2002-05-12
Posts 55 |
I remember how our voices crossed the pacific meeting half way with gm’s and sigh’s I would watch the sun grow impatient with our chatter; she’d eventually retire in the west open-mouthed and indolent the moon brought music with him purple and white flowers of affection: the truth of fairytales they all have endings you know but neither of us were listening, really. We believed in forever. Well I did. You came, you saw and you conquered You left. The flowers of affection died The fairytale ended [This message has been edited by Cirrus (06-03-2002 05:42 PM).] |
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© Copyright 2002 Cirrus - All Rights Reserved | |||
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Cirrus Interesting the way you began with such vivid imagery and then, the ending, though sad...was more..for the way you clipped out the emotion, was like a photo...where you cut out everything that mattered and left the emtyness. Hope that makes sense. I think it was effective. Hugs, you! |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
perhaps it just began...it seems to me that most myths and fairytales begin with impossiblity! Thus "the hero's journey"... love the poem... love you, and I DO understand the stance it was written from...but "hope" just HAS to be there somewhere...yes? |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Is that how that fairytale went? Came saw and conquered? Interesting. Cold and powerful. Not a trace of warmth in this particular fairytale at all. I wonder if flowers of affection die or if they only change into something else..a different kind of affection. I had always hoped that true affection isn't so easily lost. Perhaps I was wrong. As usual, excellent writing. [This message has been edited by Severn (06-03-2002 06:53 PM).] |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
(big hugggssssss) This is so very sad, sweet friend, my heart goes out to you and I hope this is a feeling that no longer applies to you, for you deserve the greatest love ever to last forever and fill your heart with magic! (sigh) My heart goes out to you, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Cirrus, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
This started as not a fairytale...but a dream coming true... With all of the splendor and beauty of a dream..... And then WHAM! Excellent, just wish it would have ended better for you... |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
However much I might wish to be Charming- I might even cry at my character's demise. Still the fairytale must go on, and though my part may have reached its end I will smile with every happily everafter, or weep at the bitter end. Hugs J There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar. byron [This message has been edited by Jamie (06-03-2002 08:35 PM).] |
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Cirrus Member
since 2002-05-12
Posts 55 |
Yes Martie, you definitely made sense thanks for stopping by and reading hon. hugs. Karen, I hope it's just begun SB? I love you. Noah, I thank you Magnus, yes a dream come true, thank you for your reply. Jamie, thank you so much for your lovely reply |
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