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Open Poetry #20
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End of The Line
| Open Poetry #20 |
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End of The Line |
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icequeen Senior Member
since 2001-12-09
Posts 633FL USA 
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End of the Line For one tiny instant Life, bathed in red flashes through my eyes, past, present, and future all merged in a single moment as an explosion of color and all I can wonder is why red? My mind spins in the splash of translucent crimson- vague thoughts and suspicions are now truth. Within seconds, I open my eyes and the room is a normal hue, the air again breathable. I look down at my hands. They shake, though I am not afraid. I lay them flat, palms down stretched on the tops of my legs and think how long before they won't carry me anymore, and they sit useless in a chair, stiff and still with my trembling fingers clutching wheels and I'm pleased there is no apprehension attached to my thoughts. My coping mechanisms intact, I take the new pills from the doctor's hand. No tears. Decisions are made inside my head. Free rides for the kids, a great big dog to help me, and we wear matching baseball caps and sunglasses to the wheelchair races at the local nursing home, and I will never again have to wait in line at Disney World. © c.r.m. 2001, 2002 [This message has been edited by icequeen (05-28-2002 09:23 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2002 Caroline Rush Markham - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
ok - first, this made me laugh at the final line. I really liked the progression of this, starting from "and all I can wonder/is/why red?" through the "losses," and finally to the ending in hope and humor. Very nice. One suggestion? Lose the bolding, it's distracting.  |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Thoroughly enjoyed the transition of the poem.... such visual imagery, very good and extremely descriptive... That ending....awesome! I can relate well to head of line....Had a brother in law who we took to Disneyworld...He got that perk.. Though I am sure he would have traded that for being able to walk on his own, to be able to take care of his own self...Surely that would have been much more fun.. Very enjoyable poem...thank you.. |
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icequeen Senior Member
since 2001-12-09
Posts 633FL USA |
oh thanks, Christopher. I had actually meant to italicize it, and put the wrong tag on... and then read your message and decided to leave all the tags off. Glad it made you laugh - it made my mother cry *LOL* I had to tell her, "MOM - stop it - you're the referee at the races so dry up and get a whistle!" |
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icequeen Senior Member
since 2001-12-09
Posts 633FL USA |
oooooops Magnus you snuck in on me, dear. Thank you so much for reading. I understand what you mean about your brother in law. I'm not in the chair as yet, but can't walk long distances. I use a cane for now. That has advantages beyond stability. It's great for fighting off muggers, scaring small yappy dogs, and doing impressions of Fred Astaire. Of course when I start dancing it looks like Frankenstein and frightens children, but they get used to it. *LOL* Yes, I'd trade all those perks to be healthy again. But perhaps my purpose in life is to simply keep going, no matter what. (And of course, to make children laugh.) |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Well, you put a smile on my face...and I admire your courage...keep making them smile!! And if my poetry gives you a smile or brightens your day...that gives me great pleasure.. [This message has been edited by Magnus (05-28-2002 09:55 PM).] |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Brilliant....wonderful write!! I'm at a loss for words...imagine that... I am in awe of your descriptive writing. ~Hugs~ |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Sometimes we can do nothing but look at the best in the worst situations...my hat's off to your courage, strength, and ability to see good in life  |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
... What to say, what to say. I'm glad that my other poetic counterpart (I have two you know, read Martie's stuff if you haven't already hon) is back..and not glad that you're unwell.. Seriously - when I discovered you here, I was so excited...my time here isn't what it used to be lol...so poems from me seem to be few and far between, but having a regular dose of the icequeen...one of the things to look forward to when I come here... Sigh honey...I think we should we catch up, on what's been missing for the last long while.. huggles K |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Hello Icequeen. This is just exceptional writing and I love the ending! |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
icequeen You inspire me with your sense of self...and ability to make an adventure out of something that others would feel had wrecked life. Strong people can do this trick...and it makes them even stronger. Your spirit sings in this, beautifully!! |
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jwesley Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563Spring, Texas |
Hey, this was cool...a pleasure to read such a spread of realism, emotion, and graciousness...well done. jwesley |
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