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Oceanus
Junior Member

since 2002-01-18

Posts 10
The Pacific

0 posted 2002-05-21 07:41 PM

Storm

The lazy clouds first
glide silently
heavy with hazy sorrows
and crushed remains of worry
at the horizon.
Then, with concern
slyly, slowly slip steadily closer.
A cat in the jungle.

The Lion's Roar
in unaffected ears
holds no promises-
like primroses,
curt and trimmed by
an iron blade,
whispering closely with the drum.

The tantalizing tang of tin
and copper
wire threaded
through the running bolts.

The sound of netting as it catches and tears
with calico precision.
I stop and watch with reddened glow
as faded negatives dance on filmy
gray.

My own private light show.

Suetang
Member Ascendant

since 2001-03-07

Posts 5187
Melbourne, Australia

1 posted 2002-05-21 07:47 PM

Hello Oceanus

Such a wonderful picture you have presented to us that was so much enjoyed by this reader.

Take care.....Sue

Suetang

msflame
Member

since 2002-05-21

Posts 188

2 posted 2002-05-21 07:59 PM

love it, just love it, only thing better is a flame over the ocean

Magicmystery
Senior Member

since 2002-02-13

Posts 821
Windsor, Ontario, Canada

3 posted 2002-05-21 08:00 PM

WOW.....
what incredible imagery!!! I enjoy a good storm myself.

sherry
Cherish the good memories past and look forward to the adventure called Tomorrow.
But above all... be kind to yourself today.

elfin_tigress
Member

since 2002-05-15

Posts 101
Someplace

4 posted 2002-05-21 08:36 PM

Excellent imagery, and a wonderful free verse, but still seeming to have structure. I love the alliteration..."the tantalizing tang of tin," "slyly, slowly, slip steadily closer..."
I applaud your word choice especially. It gives the poem a nice ring, even more so than your other poems. Beautiful, and well done on yet another wonderful poem!

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

5 posted 2002-05-21 09:44 PM

BRAVO!!! Oh my gosh, I just love the light show your wonderful words perform,s weet friend, may all our tears be washed away and replaced with the colors of hope! (big hugggssssss) This is marvelous, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Oceanus, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

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