The sad state of Toerag's state (a long overdue riposte for that rascally scalawag)

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LngJhnAg
Member Elite

since 1999-07-23

Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion

0 posted 2002-05-14 04:16 PM

Toerag will attest to this well known fact,
Tornados and divorces where he's at,
Have the same effect where they come across:
In each case someone's trailer is gonna be lost.

In Toe's trailer it would be a welcome change,
The clutter and mess, when it got rearranged,
Would improve his hygiene by a factor of ten,
Until Toe got it back to the same way again.

His unhealthy ways are a county disgrace,
The rats in the landfill won't go near his place.
It's true his abode has a tub and shower,
But the dirt on the bottom supports wildflowers.

He's a scalawag, rascal and all those things
That make him a disgrace to us human beings.
His only redeeming trait, it is clear,
Is he's one step up from that scamp Balladeer!

Yep - Toerag and 'Deer are cut from the same bolt of cloth, alright... heh

[This message has been edited by LngJhnAg (05-14-2002 04:16 PM).]

Toerag
Member Ascendant

since 1999-07-29

Posts 5622
Ala bam a

1 posted 2002-05-14 04:19 PM

Yep, what LongJohn says is true, I got the trailer from him, (a double wide), it was about to be repossessed....I couldn't resist it, it had a great transmission in the front yard, the toilet next to the porch had some great daffodils growing in it and the outhouse in back had two stalls!!!

Madame Chipmunk
Member Rara Avis

since 2001-12-05

Posts 8296
Michigan

2 posted 2002-05-14 04:21 PM

Good job, Longjohn....I knew you would get back at Mr. Toe...but as far as I'm concerned he's still one insult ahead of you...
I think his poem about you is a pretty hard act to follow...

~welcome back hugs

Lyra

copyright2002 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled" Gwendolyn Brooks

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

3 posted 2002-05-14 04:24 PM

Careful, sailor... I think that bolt of cloth also held the author of this poem... though you did get the frayed ragged edges! LOL

I keep meaning to clean up
But what's a gal to do?
I sing a song to sweet Toerag
"I only have eyes for you!"
(offkey and badly... but my own *G*)

He's so easy to look at
I don't pick up a broom
But let some female thang want in
My bat will clear the room!!
(faster and deadlier than tornadoes! *G*)

So don't talk bad of trailer parks
Come in and sit a spell
I'll make coffee... you and Toe
Can give each other hell!
(and enjoy every minute of it! LOL)

Marsha

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-10

Posts 7423
Maidstone Kent England

4 posted 2002-05-14 05:13 PM

Long John darling boy this is utterly utterly wonderful I love it, one of your best I think. So beautifully written and so below the belt I can hear the whimpers from here. Wonderful darling boy it has me smiling and I need all the smiles I can harvest right now.

How can you say such a thing, I know you just open your mouth and hey presto Great work darling boy, absolutely great, I love it utterly

Love and warm stuff
As always
Mushy

To give light to them that sit in darkness..... to guide our feet into the way of peace Luke 2:79

Poet deVine

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-26

Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley

5 posted 2002-05-14 07:56 PM

Cut from the same cloth and the seams are still sewn crooked!!! LOL I like this one sir....

Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

6 posted 2002-05-14 11:23 PM

You almost got away clean, LongJohn, and then you had to go cut your throat with the last line.

I think I'd rather take the trailer
Than living near a smelly sailor.
As far as trash, that trailer's full
But it ain't got no barnacles!

That uniform you're wearing there
Displays your menu everywhere...
There's mustard on your collar shown
And bits of meat from things unknown.

So Toe and I are quite alike?
I'm not like one who sits and brags
But at least we came from bolts of cloth
Not from a pile of filthy rags.

They say birds fall high in the air
From one whiff of your underwear
And fish turn belly up and die
Whenever you go passing by.

So get yore carcass out to sea
Cause you don't want to mess with me.
When I get done with trailer Toe
I'm coming for ya - don't ya know?

Duncan
Member Ascendant

since 2001-08-07

Posts 5455

7 posted 2002-05-15 01:06 AM

Thanks for the laugh...much needed!

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

8 posted 2002-05-15 01:30 AM

Let's see...
One lives in a messy trailer,
One lives on the smelly sea,
One lives with stinky alligators,
Not one of these guys is for me.

Darn, here I found 3 men so tall,
looking like the perfect 10,
and they're no different than the rest...
Just three more dirty old men.

hehe, just kidding (oh and by the way, it's "Hug Your Cat Week"

Let's spend less time worrying about when our life is going to end, and more on when it's going to start!

Corinne
Member Ascendant

since 1999-10-28

Posts 5167
state of confusion

9 posted 2002-05-15 02:12 AM

Ahhhh. When I read this (and the responses from Toe and Deer) I know all is right in the world, darlin'.

Cor

Nan

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-20

Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA

10 posted 2002-05-15 08:08 AM

Geesh... I wonder if my giant eraser could clean that place up???..

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

11 posted 2002-05-15 08:54 AM

Uh oh... *G* Now Nan's thinking about her eraser. *G*

Heigh ho, heigh ho... it's off to clean I go! *G*

ROFLMAO @ Deer's response... I agree with Cor... all's right with the world when you three are up to no good. *G*

kaile

Member Ascendant

since 2000-02-06

Posts 5146
singapore

12 posted 2002-05-15 01:15 PM

Tornados and divorces where he's at,
Have the same effect where they come across:
In each case someone's trailer is gonna be lost.

LohnJohn, i thought that the above lines are rather clever and witty...brought me a chuckle...

goody! i hope this battle of wits never ends...go for it..embarrass the duo

LngJhnAg
Member Elite

since 1999-07-23

Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion

13 posted 2002-05-15 02:38 PM

Oh sure - Let's shoot the messenger! lol

I love all the really neat responses. How I wish I could do this more often. Especially since 'Deer and Toe are making themselves such easy targets. heh

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