Open Poetry #20 |
Five landscapes (a Greeneyes challenge with a twist) |
bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
i. Desert aflame You were a curtain in my sky. Abstract fire hung through night. Your hands were smooth sand waterfalls. Your fingers combed my curled footfalls. ii. In the land of giants I climbed this swamp of sky to be with you today. Shattered mountain teeth lain across my fool's way. You sculpted oaken copse out of the fog for me. It's not a trick of light. You glow so golden bright. iii. Lake of moon You sky my black. Still lake of shhh-white moon. Your curving smile shardly. Sly your bonish curlicue. You glow in polished burn above the tarry road. I watch your egress arc traverse where we meet in flow. iv. Storm wall The sky, she wears gray ribbons. Tremble piles through her hair. The mountain man caused it. He waits for her despair. v. Pale water blue I saw an island in the ocean. A hole of blue in clouding sky. The water was yr pale clear eyes. We found them green among yr sighs. Hope y' enjoy!She said burn ... together. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Desert aflame You were a curtain in my sky. Abstract fire hung through night. Your hands were smooth sand waterfalls. Your fingers combed my curled footfalls. ii. In the land of giants I climbed this swamp of sky to be with you today. Shattered mountain teeth lain across my fool's way. You sculpted oaken copse out of the fog for me. It's not a trick of light. You glow so golden bright. iii. Lake of moon You sky my black. Still lake of shhh-white moon. Your curving smile shardly. Sly your bonish curlicue. You glow in polished burn above the tarry road. I watch your egress arc traverse where we meet in flow. =================================== enjoy??? oh yeah....... consider this reply the equal of imagery afterglow!!! I saw the pictures in the challenge forum...you took the challenge well beyond. very very cool poet squirrel. |
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rosepetals25
since 2000-05-31
Posts 3076PA |
bsquirrel, I enjoyed very much These are very good! Hugs, Tara "My heart is like an open book, for the whole world to read" |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
I find your work so gosh darn thought provoking! I just have a great time reading it. I find the images conjured up while reading to be most interesting. I've only got half an idea but that's where I imagine the best! |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Thanks everyone, big time. She said burn ... together. |
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Greeneyes
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
bsquirrel~ I find this more then impressing.....it is an outstanding job to the challenge, I love each one...thank you for taking tme to reply to the challenge..... Lauren~ NOW EVERYONE GO TRY ONE OR TWO..POSTED IN THE POETRY CHALLENGE FORUM....HAVE FUN I would rather have one breath of his hair, |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
bsquirrel! This is intimidating..how can the rest of us compete? Excellent job... |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
A sigh to Mr Wonderful poet. You are good! |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
have to agree...I'm completely intimidated from this challenge now...You see complete stories, where I see mere detail! tsk...giving me a crisis of confidence here, Mike...and? I don't think I can "study" YOU--smile...it's a poetic mindset you've got going on. Yep. Quote me on that. You've got it goin' on babe! |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
iv. Storm wall The sky, she wears gray ribbons. Tremble piles through her hair. The mountain man caused it. He waits for her despair. Each view was magnificent, but this one I could see clearly through. Love the way you draw your words and paint them so beautifully. Liked your title too.... |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Thanks everyone. Glad you liked my response to the challenge, Lauren. And S'en, I just does what's I does. She said burn ... together. |
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