Open Poetry #20 |
The person within |
Rick Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 2903Victoria, Australia |
Beyond the burn of eyes that meet, past shadows of the hidden The words unread in words we speak, untold and left forbidden Unknown the person deep within, who dares not take the chance A smile as gesture, habit formed, the lie of outward glance The face of yet another who with gestures tell their tale But who resolves their worries and the stories they entail? The mask of yet another as their truths just hide away Just lurking in the ruins of the mind from day to day Who rarely show their feelings or the horrors they retain The smiling face of they I know, but smile shows not their pain We only know what thoughts exist and fears that haunt our mind For no one really tells you all, and thoughts are hard to find Are any really who we think? What turns one to despair? Do any know their real true self, how many of us care? One by one surviving, taking day by day as comes As happy as the mind allows, the slave of what becomes |
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© Copyright 2002 Rick Van Weenen - All Rights Reserved | |||
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Rick, the read aloud I gave this poem only had a couple of hesitations, and that would be where you use similar words so close together [just][tale/entail - perhaps, unveil?] I always enjoy reading your poems...thank you for coming by this Sunday... |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Rick, An excellent write and enjoyed the read. |
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Opeth Senior Member
since 2001-12-13
Posts 1543The Ravines |
The title intrigued me and I was not disappointed ~ Enjoyed ~ "The mask of yet another as their truths just hide away Just lurking in the ruins of the mind from day to day" - that is one cool couplet. |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Rick, enjoyed the flow and such a very very true message of us all.... |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Rick, this is so good, your writing always speaks to me. Sandra |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Your poems are always thought filled. Wonderful to read! |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Rick...I found this so haunting. It reminded me of an elderly lady (now deceased) who had the best outlook on life I'd ever encountered. One day I noticed a number tatooed on her wrist. Our eyes met, but neither of us ever mentioned it. I need to thank you, as your words brought back the memory of a friend I'd almost forgotten. |
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SmittenKitten Senior Member
since 2001-06-20
Posts 1131where the sky and horizon meet |
Rick~ Some very important thoughts and questions...you've expressed them so eloquently. I love your use of rhyme, very melodic. *hugs* ~Krista Your beautiful words & creativity allow me to connect with the same in myself. |
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Nightshade
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
Rick - do any of us REALLY no each other? Do any of us REALLY know ourselves? I enjoyed this read very much. Chris Life is not measured by breaths you take, but by moments that take your breath away. |
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Suetang Member Ascendant
since 2001-03-07
Posts 5187Melbourne, Australia |
Hello Rick Yet another brilliant write. Your words always make the reader think and so many times relate. I enjoyed this very much. Take care.....Sue Suetang |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
(sigh) Oh Rick, this is so very powerfully contemplative, it is indeed haunting and truly I feel so many completely forsake themselves and they become nothing more than phantoms to theirselves, while I also believe while we may all not know ourselves completely, we know enough to live out our dreams! (big hugggssssss) It all depends on how willing we are to give in, sweet friend, as Adam Duritz says, the further you're in, the closer out you are." This is wonderful, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Rick, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Amazing writing here! Well done! ~Hugs~ ~Somewhere in my heart I'm always |
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Rick Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 2903Victoria, Australia |
All my wonderful friends, thank you for reading my poetry and replying with your great comments, I always look so forward to your comments and am happy when there is something that I can share with you all. Love this place, thanks for the comfort and relaxation you all help to produce in passions. Sincerely Rick |
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