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Open Poetry #25
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Albert J. Allie
Senior Member
since 2003-02-13
Posts 512
Queens NY

0 posted 2003-02-17 06:34 PM


Sightless nights claim the sun,
Where brighter days were once king.
Broken dreams taken up in it's grasp
And tomorrows lies pour in.
Forked words in deafening pitches,
Sebered Her wings and made
Dull the golden ring about her head.

A spirit defiled by pleasures
Taken from havens not of my own,
Cause crimson trails to lead,
To the final resting ground,
Of displaced members,
Once fitted for a Celestial Queen.

The taste of iniquity and the rush
Of sin become the downfall of She
Who held the heart of this lowly
Scrivener.

Sever the wings with single etyom
And close the tome to conceal,
The great spectacle.
I hear not the cries, nor do I
Concern myself.
Cardinal virtues at my fingertips
Let merciful prayers of forgiveness,
Go unanswered.


© Copyright 2003 Albert J. Allie - All Rights Reserved
Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

1 posted 2003-02-17 07:20 PM


strongly written...and sad.. seeped with closing anger...

you capture well the emotions and feel here..

I enjoyed

Albert J. Allie
Senior Member
since 2003-02-13
Posts 512
Queens NY
2 posted 2003-02-17 07:27 PM


**Tipping my hat**

Thank you Cpat!

Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
3 posted 2003-02-17 07:56 PM




(big hugggsssssss) Oh Albert, this is so very sad, sweet friend, may these wings reform soon and may all the victims of the wounds and scars learn to fly again and believe they can reach the light! (sad sigh) God Bless You, sweet friend, I send angel hugs to all the downtrodden and saddened, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Albert, thnak you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

Chanson
Senior Member
since 2000-08-19
Posts 1559
Up Creek w/Out Paddle
4 posted 2003-02-22 06:24 PM


This has an Old World charm. *s

(You might want to correct your typo--
"Sebered" should be 'severed' in the
first stanza, 6th line.)

When you think you have heard it all,
listen more closely.
~Dorene

the_loner_23
Member Ascendant
since 2002-06-08
Posts 5479
Jacksonville, Florida, USA
5 posted 2003-02-22 06:29 PM


This is so sad. but I like it. It gets my vote

Cold hands means a warm heart

Suetang
Member Ascendant
since 2001-03-07
Posts 5187
Melbourne, Australia
6 posted 2003-02-22 06:30 PM


Hello Albert

Your words were so very powerful and so beautifully written.  

Take care......Sue

I am in motion
I am blue
Love is an ocean
I'm anchored in you
- Shawn Mullins

Albert J. Allie
Senior Member
since 2003-02-13
Posts 512
Queens NY
7 posted 2003-02-22 06:48 PM


Thank you everyone! That means so much to me. Sorry about the spelling errors. Once again...that's typing in the dark for you!!!


Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
8 posted 2003-02-22 07:03 PM


I wish the story would continue ..... because it's too sad to close like this..... very impressive though.
Margherita

aries_luv_ppl
Senior Member
since 2001-09-20
Posts 1448
Universal Mind
9 posted 2003-02-22 07:11 PM


~Every girl has a dream within.

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
10 posted 2003-02-22 07:14 PM


I enjoyed your words..amd smile at Chanson ( she and I are sort of spelling experts )

M

Albert J. Allie
Senior Member
since 2003-02-13
Posts 512
Queens NY
11 posted 2003-02-22 07:15 PM


Thank you Aries.

Margherita. I closed tome and concealed the horror, never again to look upon it. That's what made me all better
Thank you for your comment!!

Albert J. Allie
Senior Member
since 2003-02-13
Posts 512
Queens NY
12 posted 2003-02-22 07:17 PM


Thank you Nakdthoughts! Once again my apologies for the errors.
carol
Senior Member
since 2003-01-25
Posts 624
Florida USA
13 posted 2003-04-17 11:27 PM


Very sad but really good poetry it gets my vote

Real friends celebrate in who we are and have faith in all that we can become
Lots of Love
Rita

garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
14 posted 2003-04-18 08:18 AM


Albert, this is a very good poem.  

Hugs,
Ethel

garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
15 posted 2003-04-18 08:19 AM


Sorry, I fogot to check the vote box.
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
16 posted 2003-04-23 01:47 PM


a very powerful piece! it's got my vote!
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