Render into Another Language

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Open Poetry #25

Render into Another Language

Corinne
Member Ascendant

since 1999-10-28

Posts 5167
state of confusion

0 posted 2003-03-19 11:17 PM

Render into Another Language

The rain is silent against this roof,
quelled by the fluff between walls,
and children running
down
halls.

It takes stepping outside
and a closed door behind
to hear the symphony –
imperfect, offbeat tempos,
octaves both higher
and lower than
Maria Callas.

Inside thin ribbons
between air and water,
a soft message refrains.

Shhhh

© 2003 Core

Margherita
Member Seraphic

since 2003-02-08

Posts 22236
Eternity

1 posted 2003-03-20 10:04 AM

You created a beautiful melody .... soothing to the ear.
Love, Margherita

RMW
Senior Member

since 2001-03-21

Posts 1424

2 posted 2003-03-20 10:23 AM

Very special, Corinne. I enjoyed this very much. Bob

Brad Majors

Member Elite

since 2001-04-03

Posts 2647
Georgia

3 posted 2003-03-20 11:12 AM

beautiful

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

4 posted 2003-03-20 11:14 AM

Corinne:

"Inside thin ribbons
between air and water,
a soft message refrains.

Shhhh"

A peaceful easy feeling in this...like the song.

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

5 posted 2003-03-20 11:14 AM

Corinne - this is wonderful!
Especially...

quote:
Inside thin ribbons
between air and water,
a soft message refrains.

Shhhh

Eromyna
Member

since 2002-11-29

Posts 306
Pheonix, AZ, USA

6 posted 2003-03-20 11:17 AM

Heck yeah. I once sat under a bridge, in a thunderstorm, and recorded that music. But I was disappointed that it seemed to lose something when I tried to play it back. I think it can only be heard properly in person.

"I don't need to scream for you to deem me aggravation."

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean

since 1999-07-07

Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

7 posted 2003-03-20 12:22 PM

Corinne
My dear an excellent write.

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius

since 2001-10-23

Posts 10549
By the Seaside

8 posted 2003-03-20 12:30 PM

This fills the empty space with quiet sounds
and leaves a song in my heart.

So nice Corinne~

Pilgrimage
Member Elite

since 2001-12-04

Posts 3945
Texas, USA

9 posted 2003-03-20 12:34 PM

Lovely. I love the rain, the peace outside. Nicely done.

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

Corinne
Member Ascendant

since 1999-10-28

Posts 5167
state of confusion

10 posted 2003-03-21 02:47 PM

Thank you all for your lovely comments!

Cor

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