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Open Poetry #25
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In Haunting Notes
| Open Poetry #25 |
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In Haunting Notes |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA 
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In Haunting Notes It was a brisk November night When I rode into that town Feeling saddle sore and weary Looking only to bed down. My clothes were dark with trail dirt My chaps were wearing thin. The wind was blowing from the east And cutting to my skin. Every hoof fall kicked up dust Upon that darkened street. I hitched up next to the saloon To get a bite to eat. My boot heels struck upon the wood. Sounds echoed in the night. The streets were bare and silent, Not a single soul in sight. Soft orange light reflected out, Cast shadows on the ground And from the depths of that saloon I heard a haunting sound. A voice so soft and full of grace Was carried out to me; The tantalizing notes she sang, I simply had to see. I entered through the swinging doors And saw her standing there In dress of red and deep blue eyes Framed with auburn hair. She looked at me and flashed a smile That lit her entire face. I wondered what a girl like that Was doing in this place. I bellied right up to the bar, Then ordered up a drink. Captured in the spell she cast, I found it hard to think. Her eyes caught mine across the room; I couldn’t look away And when she finished her last song, She turned and came my way. “Hey cowboy, it looks like to me You’re lonely and bone tired And you should know, a girl like me Prefers to be admired. I got myself a room upstairs Here in this one horse town. I’ve got a bed just right for two. You’re welcome to bed down.” She smiled once more, I couldn’t speak; She reached to take my arm; Then led me to her room upstairs, I, spellbound by her charm. “Welcome to my home,” she said. She opened up the door. The room was dark, a single lamp Cast shadows on the floor. She led me to the bed and stood Before me in the night Slipped her clothes off, piece by piece, Outlined in dimming light. Each sensual curve was accented. She stood before me there. I reached to pull her towards me, Hands running through her hair. A chain of gold graced her fair neck From which a locket dangled. She climbed in bed, right next to me, Our bodies soon entangled. We loved and talked all through the night. I drifted off near dawn And in the early morning hours I woke to find her gone. Hazy light was filtered in Through a window marred with dust; Next to me, lay on the bed The locket dull with rust. I picked it up and opened it Where, much to my surprise, I found a picture old and worn That made me doubt my eyes. The picture was in black and white. It bore the test of time. The face, though, that it held within Was no one else but mine. I had to find her, had to know What this was all about. I threw my clothes on in a rush And from the room ran out. I took the steps two at a time. I had to find that girl. But what I saw as I looked down Caused my head to swirl. The saloon lay still and empty. Silence filled the air. Old broken bottles packed the bar Not a soul was there. Tables and chairs were brown with rot. Dust coated all with white. But what I saw when I looked down Was the most unnerving sight. The floor lay thick encased in sand That had blown in through the door Disturbed by just my set of prints Where ‘we’d’ walked the night before. I ran outside to only find The town stood in decay. I jumped onto my waiting horse And quickly rode away. Years have passed, since that cold night In that forgotten town. Now on my stand, the locket rests. Some nights I take it down. I open it to see my face, A picture from the past. I’ve questions I can’t answer and There’s no one that I can ask. Sometimes at night, she calls to me From somewhere in my dreams And I’m forced to remind myself All’s never what it seems. So cowboy if you find yourself On the trail some cold , dark night And run into a quiet town Where something seems not right. Beware the girl with auburn hair And mesmerizing voice; Just saddle up and ride away While you still have a choice. She haunts the town, still in search of A love lost long ago And once you’re captured in her spell She will not let you go. Best mark my words, I see her face Bathed in that dim light Where in my dreams, she haunts me still Every single night. ~ Ruth If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it. |
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| © Copyright 2003 Ruth Kephart - All Rights Reserved | |||
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regards2you Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940California |
Ruth, This is wonderful. The rhythm and rhyme causes it to read smoothly. The story and imagery put me right there and held my interest to the end. Indeed, haunting; gives me shivers! Enjoyed greatly and would love to find this in a book. The title would single it out, and cause me to take a look. I couldn't not read it, then. Hugs, Pat  ..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
I remember. I'm glad. |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Yes!!! Much enjoyed....THIS one should be in the book for sure! ~Hugs~ ~ Trace my body with your words.. |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Wow! I love this story Ruth. Well done!  |
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Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
An excellent story-poem Ruth! |
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garysgirl  
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
A very good story that would be excellent in a book...  "Love makes the world go around" |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
what a read! the story was chilling! the poem excellent! |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg |
This is a fantastic ballad. Not only your language and grace with rhyme, but your imagination, the supernatural events you describe, reminds me of Coleridge's "Rime of the Ancient Mariner." Very strange and mysterious, with a lot of questions left up to the reader, and a moral uncertain and disturbing which can't help sticking at the rim of my brain. Just excellent work, very professionally done. If anything deserves a place in Reflections, this does. Parasite "Faith" means the will to avoid knowing what is true. |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
YEAH RUTHIE! You go gurl! This was awesome.  |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (big hugggsssssssss) Oh my gosh, this is marvelous, this had me teary-eyed because I hope I don't crawl into one of those situations as I just want to love a girl with all my heart but my only rule is for her to love me in return! (smiles) I suppose pictures can truly be a haunting experience, looking at each one is like a memory in hologram, and everything you put in a scrapbook seems to wink back at you and sometimes it makes me cry yet I know many more promises rest ahead for me! (big hugggssssss) This to me is a poem of being aware too where you came from and making sure you retrace your footsteps so you know where you've come from so you never get lost like a nomad, yay, this is marvelous, you bet my vote is on for you, yay, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Ruth, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
I believe I have read this tale by you before and it is still beautifully chilling. Loved it then and still do now Ruth. hugs Maree |
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
Ruth~ This is EXCELLENT!...had me hanging on every word. This is definitely one of my favorites of yours. Hugs, ~Vicky "...until you have read the verse on his heart, |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Thank you everyone for your confidance and your kind words. Although this poem is one of my longest, it remains one of my favorites for many reasons. Once more, thanks you all for your comments |
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SPIRIT Senior Member
since 2002-12-29
Posts 1745California Desert |
Absolutely Awesome. Gets my vote. I be me BUT who does me be? |
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Jason Lyle Senior Member
since 2003-02-07
Posts 1438With my darkling |
A western! God I love it!Very nice. Jason |
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Charisma
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906lost in blue pages |
Excellent gem  Charisma |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
hoot_owl_rn - I was listening to the blues when I read this. It seemed to blend in with the music. What a stunning write and needs to be a book entry... BC |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Read'm Cowboy... You're pretty awesome, m'friend...  |
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Andrew Scott Member Elite
since 1999-06-24
Posts 2558Redlands,CA,USA |
A story worthy of the Twilight Zone. I expected to see Rod Serling any minute. Yehaaa, Ya get my vote partner. |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Thank you evryone |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
I certainly remember this one!!!  In it goes.......  |
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Connel
since 2002-11-04
Posts 736Florida, USA |
Nicly written. Anyone can write, But only poets can capture the heart. |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
Ruth, I'm thinking that trail is here in Arizona. Am I ever glad to have read this keeper. I'm voting right away. So well done.  |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
An excellent submission choice, Ruth ... this is wonderful! Best wishes, /Kit |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Thank you everyone |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
I loved the story, the rhyme, and the chills this gave me!! Bravo! |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Hoot, you're in fine form with this compelling story! Hauntingly beautiful, yet spine-tingling! You held my interest to the very last line. Warm hugs, EA |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
cadenced kissed and a theme carried out as well as the rhyme. Very cool story telling poetess Hootie " ... And think not, that you can direct the course of love ... |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Thanks everyone, I've often thought of cutting this down somewhat, but can't bare to leave anything out |
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ecrivan Member Elite
since 2001-12-10
Posts 3923my own state |
what an interesting piece Ruth...and the making of a short fim script too inside...not as haunting as others write...but evocative and alluring, anyway it's clicked in  |
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christian Member
since 2002-12-18
Posts 331 |
flawless, in every way possible. youve earned my vote. |
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jbouder Member Elite
since 1999-09-18
Posts 2534Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash |
Well done ballad, Ruth. Very good offering. Jim |
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kayjay Member Elite
since 2002-06-24
Posts 2015Oregon |
This is an incredible write. The scenes are well painted, the meter is great, the heartsick mood so aptly described. You darn tootin' get my vote. Ken J Through rubble and trouble and dark of night |
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Justbleu Member Elite
since 1999-08-31
Posts 3329Oregon, Originally From Alaska :) |
Ruth...never am I dissappointed by my favorite passion poets....this was a great tale you told!!! I LOVED IT!!!! Bridgette |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Haunted and beautiful writing. |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Yes. *S* When a poem captivates so completely that you don't want it to end, length shouldn't be an issue. *S* Excellent! |
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Titia Geertman Member Ascendant
since 2001-05-07
Posts 5182Netherlands |
When you write like this, you deserve two pages in the book dear  Titia Like scattered leaves...my words will flow |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
It takes talent to run a story poem in metered rhyme...have missed you as well... gotta love this book thing, seems like old times, ruth. Hope all is well with you. HUGS. |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Thank you dear poets, your never ending faith in my poetry never ceases to amaze and humble me |
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rodger_jr Junior Member
since 2000-05-16
Posts 37Glen Hope, PA |
You seduce me every time you right about love or romance. I might not show it to you enough dear, but I am really proud of your poetry and very pleased that you are spending some time doing it for your own well being if not for those who can really appreciate what you write. This poem has a real life message. How many times do we ask ourselves whether of not what we remember was real or a dream of just took place so long age that everything about that time is rusted and faded away. May it be that our love never meet such a fate. With all my love, Rodger |
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Joyce Johnson
since 2001-03-10
Posts 9912Washington State |
Absolutely exquisitely riveting. Joyce |
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Lighthousebob Member Elite
since 2000-06-14
Posts 4725California |
Mesmerized me here from start to finish!!! Wow!!! What a tale. -Bob |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
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WhiteRose Member Elite
since 2002-07-23
Posts 3208somebody's dungeon |
An excellent write, it gets my vote  |
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