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Epitaph of An Aborted Child
| Open Poetry #25 |
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Epitaph of An Aborted Child |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore 
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I was glad i was to be your little girl We would have had so much fun playing Barbie dolls and sewing dresses But you frowned deeply when you saw the colours change Why, mummy, why didn't you welcome me? I was looking forward to meeting Dad A tall strong kindly figure he would be, bringing me to the zoo and teaching me baseball But you sobbed as you confided in Granny that Daddy was irresponsible and had abandoned us What, mummy, does "irresponsible" and "abandoned" mean? I kicked you playfully the other day Giggling, i squealed in delight I thought we would have a nice game of touch-a-boo But you yelled loudly and your hands pounded heavily on my delicate body Why, mummy, why did you play so rough? I was bubbling in excitement I was growing bigger by the day Soon, I would be able to see your lovely face But you put enormous tapes, hurting me so So that your bulge wouldn't show Why, mummy, why weren't you proud of me? I see white angels before me I wriggle my little fingers, delighted that you have asked them to play with me But they all look so stern and fierce Now,they are even cutting me up with sharp knives Why, mummy, why do you put me through such pain? I hear your heart-wrenching sniffles I hear Granny trying to cajole you to "eat a little" I long to go over and comfort you But everything seems so dark around here I struggle to crawl towards you, however i trip and fall Why, mummy, why have things turned out to be so dismal? |
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| © Copyright 2003 heng kaile - All Rights Reserved | |||
Mistletoe Angel 
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (tears fall down my cheeks) Oh Heng, I certainly hope this is not non-fictional and relates to yourn own life story, but if it does, know I send angel hugs out to you and you have indeed courageously deep into both the emotional and psychological trauma of neglect and abandonment and you should be so proud as you can do so many other victims justice and fill the with compassion and strength just as we are here to console you in return! (BIG ANGEL HUGS) God Bless You, sweet friend, you bet you have my vote, yay, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Kaile, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
I've read a poem very similar to this one before, truly heartbreaking |
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regards2you Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940California |
Kaile, Because of the title and content I have to believe you meant this as how an aborted child feels vs. a symbolic jester of a difficult live childhood. I, personally, have never been able to get past compassion,empathy and sympathy for the pregnant woman who has made such a choice as abortion. You might be surprised how many have. And, who they are. From all walks of life. I feel quite blessed to never having had to make such a decision. I wouldn't do it. But, I know many who have and the guilt, anguish and sometimes torture they never get over. Some even mark the date, and honor it, and weep sincere loss. For their sake, I hope they don't read this poem. It is well written, and hope it is meant symbolically, as a horrific live childhood. I trust God still is in charge of every soul and the aborted ones simply, somehow (?), are too pure to go through live birth and transfer directly to God? Mysteries of life, tear-stinging, baffling and heart wrenching, if we let them be. I can only ever say a silent prayer for the mother and the child, and trust in an awesome God who is forgiving even of this. Your poem, itself, delivered much painful anguish of a child rejected and neglected. I think you a talented writer. Hugs to you, Pat  ..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.. |
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Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
Kaile, this poem is very different from what I've read from you thus far, but I like how you managed to make me think. Heartbreaking - well done! |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg |
Kaile, I've not read your work in ages, but just as I remember... it's very emotional, even if a little politically geared. I agree with Regards2You that abortion is something entirely necessary in many situations, but I don't think you've neglected to regard the pain involved in all cases... especially in the end, where you say you (you the aborted child) wish you could go over and comfort her. This is very well done. The only problem I have is that the last line doesn't sound conclusive enough. Maybe an extra couplet at the end might be useful in closing it up. Either way, this has my vote. Parasite "Faith" means the will to avoid knowing what is true. |
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majnu
since 2002-10-13
Posts 1088SF Bay Area |
this was amazing regardless of the politics of the subject. your usage of the child voice was heartbreaking. the way you moved from harsh painfull reality to child's play was wonderful. -majnu |
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Peter J Marcroft Member
since 2003-02-02
Posts 265York, England |
An excellent piece, absolute brilliance, very poetic and the child's language just reinforces the trauma, wonderful stuff |
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LoveBug
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697 |
My goodness... this is quite a vivid and powerful piece. This has a very strong and heart-wrenching message, and it's just a wonderful piece all around. Vote!! Peace I leave with you, My peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you.--Jesus Christ |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Yes, this certainly is a powerful poem.... very sad.... "Love makes the world go around" |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
hey, thanks for the replies! Parasite, politically geared? hmmm, you have me curious here...what do you exactly mean? do you mind elaborating more? hey, thick skin is one of my strengths...  thanks for your suggestion also. I wrote this a lifetime ago when I was starting out to write. This poem just came to me one day and all I had to do was to pen it. Beginner's luck huh? So I guess I rather not edit this because I want to stay true to the 20 year old me...i trust you don't mind? On hindsight, i can't believe I was so bold and perhaps emotionally detached to write this musing. I was flushed with the excitement of being a writer and didn't really understand what a painful reality I am trying to jot down. Pat, I wasn't being talented. I was being self-involved in my perceived "talents" guess that's why I'm submitting this for the book. because I don't think i can't write something like this ever again... |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Personally, I find this poem extremly touching. Very well written particularly on a very touchy, emotional issue. I salute you on your writing... Regards, Sudhir |
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Wind
since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981 |
I can relate. I don't disagree with abortion, but thank god I was adopted. This makes me really sad. the Wind is invisible. |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
thanks Sudhir for your salute. Wind, sorry for evoking sadness in you. |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
"guess that's why I'm submitting this for the book. because I don't think i can't write something like this ever again...] I sure disagree with you Kaile, if you could write with such an impact once you have the talent to do it again! This hit its mark and was exceptionally well written. [This message has been edited by Mysteria (02-19-2003 03:07 PM).] |
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dgvarner Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552High Springs, Florida |
Kaile..I dont feel you were being self-involved in writing this..I feel you were writing from your perspective..we all do that...we write what we know - this is all you know of this subject.. I think you did a fine job with what you know, and what you speculate, and how you feel about abortion.. I find this piece chilling to read..difficult to read..Thank goodness I've never been close to anyone who's had an abortion..I'm not sure I would know how to handle it.. take care my friend! hugs, g "laughter is the shortest distance between two people" - victor borge |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
kaile? I think this is excellent and YES, you do get my vote...(but? I do vote elsewhere too!) with hugs, winks, and smiles |
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Justbleu Member Elite
since 1999-08-31
Posts 3329Oregon, Originally From Alaska :) |
You wrote about a very difficult topic...from a unique point of view. This poem shows your talent well. My vote is in!!!! Bridgette |
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angsana Member
since 2002-11-11
Posts 77 |
Very touching...makes me feel sad for those babies who never made it to the world. Great write Kaile! angsana |
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SPIRIT Senior Member
since 2002-12-29
Posts 1745California Desert |
Very interesting write, it gets my vote. I be me BUT who does me be? |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
You probably already know what I'm going to say. You've done well with a very difficult subject, one with many more questions than answers, more heartache and remorse than most lost love subjects. It's way beyond politics in my opinion. If you ever put down your pen, I'll fly over there and spank you! |
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Charisma
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906lost in blue pages |
.....heartwrenched piece., excellent penned. Charisma |
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NewEnglandlazurlu Member Rara Avis
since 2002-01-04
Posts 7470A Mountain Paradise |
A gut-wrenching poem that will rip at the heart of every woman whether they have had an abortion or not. I believe that all aborted babies are held in the hands of God forever where they remain happy and protected. It is those left behind who dramatically suffer the loss. May God show His love and Mercy to anyone who felt they had to make this decision. Hugs to you, Marti Dwelling on the negative simply |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
You have tackled a very difficult subject here, from a perspective that I never would have thought to write. THat is what makes this poem unique, although Hoot Owl says she read one very similar. It is a very delicate matter to undertake. I was intrigued by this topic Liz |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
No need to dissect this one -- it's good. |
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aries_luv_ppl Senior Member
since 2001-09-20
Posts 1448Universal Mind |
This touches me. You are a great writer. ~Every girl has a dream within. |
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