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Open Poetry #25
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Cpat Hair
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since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793


0 posted 2003-03-15 10:47 PM



So the anger and the booze
Made you decide that 7
Was a good time to sleep.

Well, it was ok with me
I was tired of walking
On my own words
And picking pieces
Of them out of
Bare soul

Your soles now
Lie uncovered,
And I see they
Are unblemished

But then again

You didn’t say
Much…
Except to make sure
I knew how
My words
Were
Dull

© Copyright 2003 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved
Balladeer
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Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
1 posted 2003-03-15 10:52 PM


LOL! I've had dates like that.....uh, ALL of my dates were like that!


On the serious side, you continue to make every word serve to set the perfect mood....a real gift.

Cpat Hair
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2 posted 2003-03-15 10:57 PM


thank you sir... think I'll stick to free verse and leave the rhyme to those that do it well.. you were right..you could see why I don't work in rhyme.. LOL


regards2you
Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940
California
3 posted 2003-03-15 11:38 PM




Oh dear, this seems so real. Isn't love grand? Sorry. I just got a phone call (honest, 10 min. ago) and that woman, from anger and vodka, first, wiped out the entire kitchen, every dish, cup, pot, pan became air born and then fell asleep on the toilet!
Slight communication gap, for her husband forgot to tell her he went fishing with a group that included a single woman. Who was the one who told her she went fishing with 'them'....

No laughing matter... heartbreakingly real. You captured a very disturbing part of life. Alcohol and anger and hurt feelings. Bad mix.

Liked the word play  re: sole/soul....


Hugs, Pat



  

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
4 posted 2003-03-15 11:43 PM


When there's nothing to say, sleep is always a good option.
Kethry

Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind.  Unknown



Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
5 posted 2003-03-15 11:49 PM


Your words poet sir..could never ever be dull!
~Hugs~

~ Trace my body with your words..
And in doing so, you touch my heart. ~

Mistletoe Angel
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Portland, Oregon
6 posted 2003-03-15 11:58 PM




(big hugggssssssss) Yep, I too am a Saturday night spirit, I like to stay up light and play the guitar as I stay up late every night so I can be acquainted with it after experiencing childhood nightmares! (sigh) So I find it medicine to sing through the night, this is wonderful, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Ron, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

VAS
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450
Oregon
7 posted 2003-03-16 01:31 AM


fascinating...the images are mesmerizing, and yep, your words are never dull, walking on them couldn't even do that, though tenderizing I'm sure has been known to happen, I've seen it in your history

Whether on the shoal or on the shore,
I'll seek the lighthouse evermore.

Ratleader
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Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
8 posted 2003-03-16 09:32 AM


LOL -- Man's eternal quest...to escape alive just once...even once!

Your imagery here is exquisite, and so's that gee-whiz atmospere you created with it. You are The Man. Which didn't help in this case, eh?

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Midnitesun
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Gaia
9 posted 2003-03-16 10:31 AM


You ARE rhyme....don't fight it.
But then, you are also a free verse master.

You have a way of touching a nerve that was trying to hide unnoticed, yet desperately needing to be touched.

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

10 posted 2003-03-16 10:46 AM


It's hell just before they pass out...

sometimes misery does not love company.

Hugs you.


Sunshine
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Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
11 posted 2003-03-16 10:54 AM



As said before...you have
a real gift...

It's nice seeing you here
on the weekends...

    Karilea - If I whisper, will you listen?...

Duncan
Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455

12 posted 2003-03-16 11:43 AM


I've had that date and I've been that date.  Not a total waste, you got a poem out of it!  
littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
13 posted 2003-03-16 12:12 PM


Ron - far from dull here - far from it - nice job xxoo
passing shadows
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since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
14 posted 2003-03-16 01:00 PM


love this!
Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
15 posted 2003-03-16 01:34 PM


oooh, ouch. This was one bad night.

Cor

garysgirl
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since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
16 posted 2003-03-16 01:42 PM


It is bad when somebody wants to go to sleep in the middle of a conversation with you....and worse yet, if they do it.  LOL  
1slick_lady
Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace
17 posted 2003-03-16 02:14 PM


OUCH !!! ((((BIG HUGS))))
wranx
Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn
18 posted 2003-04-12 01:02 AM


When I've stepped on my words, I also ended up steppin' on a part of my anatomy best not trod upon.
lost_star
Member
since 2003-03-15
Posts 114
NY, U.S.A
19 posted 2003-04-12 01:36 AM


Very cute. I liked this one!
LUV_R_GIRL2379
Junior Member
since 2003-04-09
Posts 42

20 posted 2003-04-12 03:28 AM


ooh sounds like a really bad night! this poem was excellent! you have a very unique gift.keep on writing em'!
Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704

21 posted 2003-04-12 05:16 AM


Ron...

thanks for this - I was searching tonight...come across the second poem that reaches in and rings bells somewhere...

hugs

K

vandana
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since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
22 posted 2003-04-12 07:14 PM


enjoyed
kaile
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singapore
23 posted 2003-04-13 12:12 PM


Your soles now
Lie uncovered,
And I see they
Are unblemished

interesting way of putting things across, of how you must have been looking at the ground, in the midst of this awkwardness..

littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
24 posted 2003-04-13 12:34 PM


Ron:

I was tired of walking
On my own words
And picking pieces
Of them out of
Bare soul

me too . . . me too
awesome write    xxoo

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350
the ass-end of space
25 posted 2003-04-13 03:09 PM


Ouch...nice to see you posting, but..ouch, btw lmao at Ed's reply
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