Open Poetry #25 |
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j0n4th4n Member
since 2003-03-11
Posts 94 |
I will feel tears in July, I know it. When you leave forever, travel lightly. Don't let my loose tears sadden you; Fly away, I know you'll never return you'll cross broadening sky, sweep quietly over grey seas; carried in cloud, you'll vanish and decrease When I think of you now, seeing you here, I want to hold on to you not let time steal you or distance. But I can't hold you; I know you'll go and never come back: you'll melt into smooth crowds effortlessly, far away over many sad waves And you'll forget a time you once knew. Forget the hard blue breezes, the grey-and-yellow sea-city, the steep valley-sides, the bright arched buliding where we first talked. Fall away from me plunge deep into cruel summer sky, you'll be gone, despite the brightness Will we ever meet again? you, black-haired black eyed will soon flow away into your own shape; carried to another planet. July will be the last month I'll see you; may it rain this day you go. As I write now I feel tears, but I know more will spill then. Will you remember my face? Will I remember yours? [This message has been edited by j0n4th4n (03-11-2003 03:58 PM).] |
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© Copyright 2003 j0n4th4n - All Rights Reserved | |||
JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Like this...James |
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Nightshade![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
Welcome to Passions! Lovely first post. Enjoy yourself here. Chris ![]() "Hope" is the thing with feathers- |
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Brad Majors![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-04-03
Posts 2647Georgia |
This piece is so full of sadness and anguish at future sadness. Very well done and welcome! |
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the_loner_23 Member Ascendant
since 2002-06-08
Posts 5479Jacksonville, Florida, USA |
I feel the sadness in your write. It is hard to lose one you love so dear. great write. Cold hands means a warm heart |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
WELCOME TO PASSIONS! Much enjoyed your first post. I look forward to seeing more of your work. ~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~ ~ Trace my body with your words.. |
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chasing rain Senior Member
since 2001-05-15
Posts 737Canada |
What can I say, other than I enjoyed this terribly? The surreal, yet tangible tone and feel to this poem makes it sincerely unique, wistful and heartwarming. The use of imagery is well executed. Loved it terribly. And Welcome to Passions! Leah ![]() |
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icequeen Senior Member
since 2001-12-09
Posts 633FL USA |
The feeling of loss in your words is an ache that almost burns. So pretty in its sadness, and it brings back much to me, as I have felt that loss also. Welcome to Passions. I hope to see more of your work here soon. Enjoyed this one muchly. the only man worth your tears will never make you cry |
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Mistletoe Angel![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
![]() ![]() ![]() (big hugggssssssss) Goodbye truly is the saddest word in the dictionary, dearest friend, this is a touching debut that copes with this reality and I only that special someone always holds those memories of you dear, I send many angel hugs your way! Welcome to Passions, sweet friend, may you be inspired by all of us here as we will all be inspired by your lovely words! I can't wait to read more of your lovely words, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, thank you for sharing! ![]() ![]() May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Nice...very nice...very very nice! Welcome to Passions! Please, check your E-mail for a Special Greeting! Karilea |
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NewEnglandlazurlu Member Rara Avis
since 2002-01-04
Posts 7470A Mountain Paradise |
WELCOME TO PASSIONS! I think your first poem was outstanding, very sad though. It brought emotions out of me. My indication of a good writer! I look forward to reading more. Hugs, Marti Few are those who see with their own eyes and feel with their own hearts. |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
Jon - Welcome to PIP - nice write - keep osting xxoo |
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j0n4th4n Member
since 2003-03-11
Posts 94 |
thanks everyone for your great replies! much appreciated |
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