Thanks Karilea. Was unsure of whether to post this as two separate poems.
Neither seemed special enough to post alone, and the last rhyming part was written immediately after the first.

So...two poems in one.

Thanks agin for your time in reading and replying. I do appreciate it.

Hugs, Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

Cpat,

Yes, it does change in form and flow and thought.

Though I beg to differ on your assessment of content, if I do look at it from a self-rejecting/denial point of view, it initally makes me laugh, but I can see what you might mean; tho. that was not and is not my intent. That it mirrors many of life's issues, probably true, and, again, suppose it could reflect internal conflicts.


A young neighbor visited me for awhile and she is smitten with someone who works at same company. She is quite heart sick.....for he hasn't made much, to very little, attempt to get involved, yet she (thinks) she is madly in love.  This poem came about after her visit with me, and my sugestion to her to let it go awhile.    
I enjoy other people's thoughts regarding poetry....thank you.

Sy,

Thanks for reading and the respond.

Hugs to you both, Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

- And so it was that time stood still -
     (blink, breathe, stand, fight)

Your poem deserves two replies! I'll point out my second favorite line, too:
"I grit my grinding teeth
     In time
To jaw muscles rhythm
And,
  Crunching rhyme."
'everything I do is with some kind of rhythm.. usually my breathing and hearts beat. whenever I get the strength, I do it! Love this.
And to answer your questions, yes.. they've prayed over me and with me, as a hands on healing. And I've been anointed with oil. And yes, I've prayed it myself.. ahh many times. It seems He's saying wait. Guess I still have more to learn. I'm thinking Job's trials and Paul's thorn in the flesh... works good after you about die lol!

Thank you for prayers, here's some for you.
Love ya
Always, Alyssa

- And so it was that time stood still -
     (blink, breathe, stand, fight)

Alyssa,

I too,  have an ongoing medical problem which effects 'everything' I do, and limits me considerably. I had to grin at your reference to Paul's thorn, for often I have thought the same thing.  You, however, are just plain too young to be going through such difficulty. There, now that I've played God I feel much better. Smiling here. Heart felt hugs and love to you.

Michele,

What wonderful things you said. Sorry, about your shallow shadow man. Hugs, Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

Phantom Poet,

Sorry, don't remember your name yet, but thank you for taking the time to read and reply. Glad you enjoyed this and the thoughts. Alyssa (aged 15) and I usually have a little more than usual to say to one another. Smiles here. She suffers with migraines and can see why she could relate to the first part of this poem.


Hugs, Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

Gemma,

What an awesome thing to say. How sweet of you. If you could see my struggle getting lines right, with umpteen drafts for a short poem, you'd grin....Only been seriously writing a short while. So your compliment means a great deal. But, I'm not that good.
Some topics better than others.

Happy week-end and thank you.
You made my day,

Hugs and love, Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

Icequeen,

Thank you. Glad you mentioned the two poems and that they do work. I was really unsure; I simply have a hard time critiquing my own, (or anyone's) work. Again, thanks and glad you like this. You have 153 posts and I don't think I've read  you, for I would have remembered your username. I'll look for your work.

Hugs to you, Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

- And so it was that time stood still -
     (blink, breathe, stand, fight)

PatMYFRIEND~

'I'll fly the flight of wounded
And sing love's song awhile
To the universal shore
A broken heart, beguiled.

Listen to my heartbeat's rhythm
Glad it's free once more
You were soul flirting with my mind
Mere vagabond of poet's lore.

Please, go upon hell's happy way
I'll grab grace's grin, be healed
You a shallow, shifting shadow
But a ghost in my mind's reveal.'

In shadows change of rearrange
your spirit now soars free
Come of peace and ye shall find
poetic wings of angelic kind~

May His wisdom guide you to more peaceful places~
He works His wonders in our lives~
Bless you, Pat~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
[email protected]

Giving this one a boost for a friend~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
[email protected]