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Open Poetry #25
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Guardurthoughts
Member
since 2001-10-16
Posts 66


0 posted 2003-03-02 03:56 AM



The only trace of their liquid rage is the heat seared along my skin. Nothing is the same, my face is numbed by pain and furry, my eyes deceive me. In a blurry frenzy I watch as the gray walls around slowly inch to box me in like a wild animal. I am suffocating in this agony and torment; I am drowning in tears.

My heart beats with a faint pitter-patter, weak and alone, it only lives to die. Untrue love and false promises poison my heart, ‘tis no longer full of its vigor and cheerfulness. A Shadow lurks around deep within, forgotten and alone my spirit whimpers in the unforgiving darkness.

I am stripped of all life and spirit, can you not spare me the one thing I need to survive in this bloodthirsty world.
Do you not see it? I am alone. I am unprotected. I am nobody. You left me with the very thing I lost in this battle of love….Myself.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Re-write from another name...thanks ahead of time for all your support and comments.

~~~Gaurdurthoughts~~~

"the best and most beautiful things cannot be seen,or even touched. they must be felt with the heart"

© Copyright 2003 Erica Grover - All Rights Reserved
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
1 posted 2003-03-02 05:36 AM


yes, those battles are fatal...and lonely.


the_loner_23
Member Ascendant
since 2002-06-08
Posts 5479
Jacksonville, Florida, USA
2 posted 2003-03-02 11:00 AM


Yes this is such a truthful poem. *click* My vote is in.

Cold hands means a warm heart

regards2you
Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940
California
3 posted 2003-03-02 11:10 AM




Erica,

Very powerful write, realistically filled with defeat and a need to surrender. A wonderful description of powerlessness.

At these points in time is when I reached out to a God, I didn't believe in, and He was there, touching in ways only He can, sometimes through others, through something read, or, spiritually, when you ~know~ it is Him.

Thank you for this. Well written,

Hugs, Pat


..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
4 posted 2003-03-02 12:38 PM


It's a lonely place you've written about...the heart that stands beating alone.
Kellie_Cantrell
Senior Member
since 2002-05-22
Posts 1667
New York
5 posted 2003-03-02 01:09 PM


Very sad but good!
Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
6 posted 2003-03-02 08:26 PM




(big hugggsssssss) Oh Erica, this is a very emotionally tugging write, sweet friend, my heart goes out to you and I hope all is okay and you have found yourself again and replenished with hope! (sigh) You have my vote, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Erica, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
7 posted 2003-03-02 09:05 PM


Very powerful write.
~Hugs and a vote~

LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion
8 posted 2003-03-30 06:05 PM


You've done well explaining the hardest part about falling apart - not losing the other person's heart, but losing your self because you'd already surrendered it.  Nicely done.
carol
Senior Member
since 2003-01-25
Posts 624
Florida USA
9 posted 2003-04-22 11:04 PM


Great write

Real friends celebrate in who we are and have faith in all that we can become
Lots of Love
Rita

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