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Tell me This Isn't Happening!!!
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Tell me This Isn't Happening!!! |
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gracianna Member
since 2002-02-17
Posts 165A 14 year hell 
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Oh man! Muchos problemos here....this girl at school keeps hitting me, "not very hard" as she claims. It keeps leaving bruises, and the people at church keep asking about them! ARGH!!! I just want them to leave me alone! I HATE talking, or "discussing" as they call it, my life! It's none of their business, and they just won't drop it! I HATE talking in general, and to quote a favorite movie of mine, "My goal in life is to be invisible...and I'm good at it." Why can't they just leave me be?? If I tell them about this girl, they she will get into trouble and make life even more miserable then it already is. We are both 8th graders, and I have 4 more years of school with her!! Gr....sorry, just had to let off a little steam... I give a whole new meaning to the word 'sad.' |
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| © Copyright 2002 gracianna - All Rights Reserved | |||
SEA 
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
if you let her hit you, she will. Bottom line. Hit her back or tell someone....or let her hit you. Those are your choices. If you were my daughter, which you are a year older than my oldest, I would give her the options and let her make a choice....what do you want here? Do you like her hitting you? Does it interfere with your life enough that you want it to stop? If you answer yes, then you have to change it. Try ASKING her what her trip is, why she hates you so much to hit you like that? If she is just a complete jerk, well, others will probably tell me what horrible advice this is, but if it was me or mine, I'd hit her back...defend yourself...tell someone who will make her stop....stop her yourself, or let it continue...it is up to you. I hate to see you getting hit. And God help the child that hits mine....you may not want to tell someone, but if this is more than you can handle, then you need to. Suckin deal sweetie, you need to make a choice....I'm here if you want to email me. (((hugs))) |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
A peer 'hitting' you isn't something you should be putting up with. This person is nothing more than a bully who is imposing a dominant/subservient understanding between the two of you. You're being physically wounded. This isn't acceptable, gracianna. This won't get better in the next four years, it'll get worse. Your self esteem and your safety are both at risk. I can't stress stongly enough how important it is for you to find a way to put a stop to this. Avoid this person, first and foremost. If that doesn't work, find help... from someone. The people who are encouraging you to get help have only your best interests in mind. You could find yourself in real danger if you don't stop these behaviors now. Please do something to stop it? |
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gracianna Member
since 2002-02-17
Posts 165A 14 year hell |
That's the problem, though. I can't hit her back, because I will get in trouble at school and at home. I can't tell someone I know because they will get someone to stop her, and she'll make life a whole lot worse than it already is. I suppose I could just let her get on with it, but that won't stop people from bugging me at church! |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
not buying it for a second.....you have to stop her. Hitting her back may not be an answer, fine.....I'm great with that. However, you assuming that it will get worse if you tell really freaks me out. It will put a stop to it. How much trouble do you think she will get in? She could get expelled. Schools have a no tolerance policy and she will be gone, and then through at home. I highly doubt she will bother you again. Not to mention the legal factor here.....your parents could sue hers....people who work together can sue for harassment, students can too now....there is no reason good enough to NOT put a stop to this. Maybe if you tell, then you can go to another school, don't say you can't. Seattle is huge....you may not like to tell people what is happening, but I can darn near guarantee that if you tell the folks at church, they can help in keeping you protected. It is your choice, no one can do this for you, but if you want it to stop and hitting back in self defense isn't an option, then girl, quit playin....TELL SOMEONE  really, please tell someone. You don't have to put up with her abuse. |
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gracianna Member
since 2002-02-17
Posts 165A 14 year hell |
okay. I'm still not all that convinced that this is a great idea, though...  |
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RosePetal
since 2001-08-26
Posts 2985South Florida |
Definitely tell someone...This girl may be bullying other girls around as well! I understand that you don't want to hit her back, but she hits you because she knows she can get away with it! Please tell someone...like the principal..or an administrator. No one has the right to put their hands on anyone else, don't stand for it! What if one day she hits you hard enough and fractures or breaks your jaw? Then it will have to be wired shut for six long months to heal, do you want that? Really Gracianna you need to to take some form of action, I beg you to! [This message has been edited by RosePetal (02-24-2002 11:14 PM).] |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
honey, I know what it means to be hit..... I didn't tell for two years, and when I finally did, I was free...and I haven't seen him for almost 9 years....you do make it better when you tell. But when you tell them, tell them loud and clear, and TRUTHFULLY....leave nothing out....give dates and times all that stuff...Be direct, tell them how it is making your life a hell. This is something you DO NOT have to put up with, not for a second. Good girl good for you...tell someone |
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gracianna Member
since 2002-02-17
Posts 165A 14 year hell |
Don't have a heart attack!!  I already said that I'd tell! You don't have to worry about me so much. Why should you bother? Besides, today's Sunday....no school till tomorrow. *sigh* |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
fine, no problem....I wish you good luck in your situation.... |
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Hypnosis Member
since 2001-12-02
Posts 325CO |
Ys I strongly agree with what has been suggested. Now I would be the person who would have just enough of one thing happening and making a statement by putting it back right in their face literally. However there are people who aren't like that, and I can fully understand that. Something must be done, whether it be one of these suggestions, or something more creative and effective. I hope something ends this brutality soon, its just is not healthy. If you need to e-mail me or something, i would be glad to talk, if you need, don't be afraid. Randy Meador a life lived unexplored is a life not worth living. |
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gracianna Member
since 2002-02-17
Posts 165A 14 year hell |
Thanks again guys for reading my venting and caring. |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
My dear, when you go to school tomorrow, you'll have all 5000 members of Passions in Poetry behind you. You've joined THIS family now and we care about what happens to you. If the girl hits you, tell her you're going to the principal. And then do it. Walk away from her and walk right into the office. Ask that she join you there for some mediation into this problem. Good luck!!  |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
She is hitting you. This is assault. Her assaults are leaving trauma upon your body and emotions. This is not only immoral, it is illegal. Please, contact whatever authority is appropriate. Hugs you. |
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gracianna Member
since 2002-02-17
Posts 165A 14 year hell |
ok... God, I'm scared...I'll probably be on later tonight...Insomnia and all that fun stuff... |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
insomnia - i know all about that (s'why i'm here right now when i should be sleeping) Susan - you're like on this whole crusade thing lately! Been taking your vitamins!  Wholeheartely agree with almost all that's said here. I was alittle guy in school, and for some time after i was removed from private school and placed into public school (right about your age) i was the focus of several bullies. My course of action was to fight back. at first i had my butt kicked a few times, but i figured since that part was already happening, no biggie - pride is by far more exacting than bruises of this magnitude. after a while, upon realizing that i wasn't easy meat anymore (i learned how to fight - both experience and martial arts taught me to use my smaller size to a definite advantage). after that, there was an almost grudging respect and all but complete stoppage of the bullying. it's not fun for the bully if the target is able to fight back - bullies by nature look for the weak. not always, but often, victims are such by choice. i'm glad to see you're going to take a different path. peace, Christopher |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
It's Monday - be strong - To to school - Don't hit her back - That won't solve it. Choose carefully who to tell - Bring a friend with you if you need to do that. Go to a guidance counselor or a teacher that you trust. Start somewhere that feels safe. Don't worry - please... This is only the first step to your freedom. It'll work - and you'll be smiling again...  |
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gracianna Member
since 2002-02-17
Posts 165A 14 year hell |
I'll be on after 5PM today, (8PM EST) and let you know what happened...*gulp* I leave for school in a half hour... |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
uhmmm... just to make sure in case i misrepresented myself: i wasn't suggesting you hit back. though i disagree that violence doesn't solve anything, there's a time and place for everything. i think your choice to take it to the authorities is definitely the best in this situation. peace, C |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
I hope it went well for you.... and no, violence isn't the answer to things, not always but there are times when it becomes necessary....the hope is to be able to handle it other ways and it should always be a last resort... |
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Irie Senior Member
since 1999-12-01
Posts 1493Washington State |
I realize that I might be too late with a reply as it's already Monday but..... When I was in school, for years the same girl terrorized me to a point of almost no return. Then to my horror, she moved six houses away from me. One day at the community pool she approached me and gave a rash of her usual self and I stood up to her. I told her (shaking in my boots) that if she wanted to kick my butt to do it now and get it over with, that I was sick and tired of her crap. So just do it and be done with it. And you know what, I think it scared her because she just stood there and stared at me. I walked away and told her I'd be in the cabana if she changed her mind. She never followed up and she never said a word to me until 3 months later and to my shock, she was actually nice. Just another approach to think about taking. I hope it all works out for you. ~Sheri |
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gracianna Member
since 2002-02-17
Posts 165A 14 year hell |
Well...it didn't go all that well. Girl X was bothering me, and I told her I was going to the principal...anyway, she didn't take it that well...She's gone, all right, but I have two black eyes to remember her by. I never knew that there were so many cuss words! I think she was swearing in other languages as well...anyway, thanks for your help. Jeez, now I'm scared to even be at home!! Oh well...it wasn't the worst thing that could have happened... |
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RosePetal
since 2001-08-26
Posts 2985South Florida |
Oh my gosh, she gave you two black eyes? Where was everyone when this happened? No teachers witnesssed this?!?! My dear you really must have your parents phone the school and report it to your adminstrator or principal! I can't believe the nerve of this girl...If I was there I would knock her out for you...i'm sorry but at some point you have to fight back sweetie or at least take legal action. (hugs) |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Two black eyes? Number one, get medical attention, and two, a police report--AND an attorney if necessary. OR....you could send me an airline ticket and I will personally escort you to school...grrrrrr... |
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gracianna Member
since 2002-02-17
Posts 165A 14 year hell |
Chill, chill...she did this in the principal's office. She was arrested, and expelled, all in a split second! [This message has been edited by gracianna (02-25-2002 08:48 PM).] |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
well then, I think ( and so sorry about your eyes) that this ended rather well...it could have gotten ugly, and I am so glad it didn't. If your parents freak out and want to know why you didn't tell them, be honest....tell them to your way of thinking, it would have made things worse, and that you wanted to handle this on your own. I am happy this is resolved and that she got arrested!!  glad you told |
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gracianna Member
since 2002-02-17
Posts 165A 14 year hell |
 I give a whole new meaning to the word 'sad.' |
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Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL |
I've been watching this thread and I wanted to give all involved here in this discussion (especially Gracianna) a big (((HUG))) because I think this went very well, and its wonderful to see that a place like this could have an effect on a situation such as the one asked about here. School was scary enough for me when I was younger and with the world changing since then like it has, I could imagine that it is even more dangerous these days. The very first time I stood up for myself in the face of a bully was a totally refreshing experience that left me smiling and confident all day. Little did I know I had a longer battle to face, but still that was my jumping off point. This isn't the way it should be done, but I actually started to hit back at one point because telling wasn't helping all that much. Another way I dealt with it was when anyone confronted and threatened me, I just got really loud with them. Sometimes it worked. Sometimes they left me alone because by being loud I had drawn attention to them and they got sort of uncomfortable with an audience and the possiblity that an authority figure was in that audience somewhere. Anyway, the situation was never perfect, but I managed to stand up for myself more and more as time went by. LOL! Okay..rambling me. Like I said..I just wanted to let everyone know I think you all did a wonderful job in this thread. It makes me smile and I had been concerned. *Jenn* For all who watch.Dare you say hello? Come in and ask the questions that are on your mind, but spare me your judgement until you truly sipped of me. |
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Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL |
ohh..and for some reason I was always lucky enough to avoid being seriously "beaten" on, but I believe if it had come to that point I would have fought back without even having to think because I had such a temper. The guys who picked on me were always amazed when they threatened me and I stood my ground..telling them to "go ahead". I figured if I was going to get beaten up I was going to go down with a fight. LOL! lucky me..I've never been in a real fight. I'm not saying fighting or hitting back is the way to solve it though. Geesh..people bring more weapons to school now more than I ever knew they did, so if I were in school today, I'd probably be more reluctant too. anyways...I came back to ramble..I'm finished again. For all who watch.Dare you say hello? Come in and ask the questions that are on your mind, but spare me your judgement until you truly sipped of me. |
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gracianna Member
since 2002-02-17
Posts 165A 14 year hell |
Hey guys. I'm not going to be going on anymore. I have to move cause of, well, you know. Anyway, if I do come back on, I will be on a different username because Girl X know s my online name. I will not be on for a while, I think. ANyway, I just found out about 10 minutes ago that I was moving. See you around. By the way, if you want to e-mail me, the one listed is not my real one. They are trace-able, you know. I might e-mail one of you guys on my real e-mail sometime. Bye! |
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RosePetal
since 2001-08-26
Posts 2985South Florida |
Justice is being served now that the girl is arrested and expelled! Now she is the one who is going to get pushed around in juvenile hall! (hugs) |
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