Open Poetry #19 |
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What should the title be? |
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aries_luv_ppl Senior Member
since 2001-09-20
Posts 1448Universal Mind ![]() |
Lovely day as spring breathes, somehow I can't enjoy her wind, which stirring under her wings blessing lovebirds. Lovely evergreen forest, somehow I can't press against her soil, for I'm shutted in a hut, waiting for help. Lovely songs of the forest, somehow I can't sing along her songs, for inside I'm lonely alone in forest. Lovely sunshine of the day, somehow I can't walk in her for my heart is trouble preventing me from the sun. Lovely paths of the forests are equally laid before my eyes. Somehow I can't choose for worries are in my mind. Lovely morning of spring, chances are waiting for me. Somehow I have to lift my shoulders releasing myself to joy. Eliza Simmons ~Flower lasts so an hour, yet spring will brings her back to life again. [This message has been edited by aries_luv_ppl (03-28-2002 02:58 PM).] |
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© Copyright 2002 Eliza Simmons - All Rights Reserved | |||
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
aries_luv_ppl, Interesting, enjoyed the read. |
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aries_luv_ppl Senior Member
since 2001-09-20
Posts 1448Universal Mind |
thanks ![]() Eliza Simmons |
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Mistletoe Angel![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
![]() ![]() ![]() (smiles) Awwwwwww, this is gorgeous, sweet friend, the beauty of springs sunshine fills your heart! (kiss on cheek) I think because "lovely" is a hook used to start every new stanza, maybe something like "Ain't It Lovely?" would be a gorgeous title! We all love you so much, sweet friend, this is fabulous! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Eliza, thank you for sharing! ![]() May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton |
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Midnitesun![]()
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
Eliza, you are really getting good at your imagery. I especially liked this: "Lovely morning of spring, chances are waiting for me. Somehow I have to lift my shoulders releasing myself to joy." It's good to know you are the one in control of lifting your wings. Hugs, and have a happy weekend. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Enjoyed this...I recommend "Somehow"...James |
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Marge Tindal![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Eliza~ It's a piece that looks dark and then heads for the light ... I think JamesMichael had a lovely choice for the title ! *Hugs* ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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