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Open Poetry #19
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I Chop You Fall
| Open Poetry #19 |
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I Chop You Fall |
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
My stone honed you fine, Double bladed steel of mine, Firmly grip and swing, In motion a splendid thing That touches with bite Transferring anger and might, Chips are flying free Each touch reducing the tree Till finally falls Deep in the forest green halls, Rests in defeated recline. Gloom |
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| © Copyright 2002 Aszard Drazlom - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
This is a pretty darned good metaphor, Sir Gloom... I enjoyed..  |
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Silver Streak Member Elite
since 2002-01-02
Posts 3625FL, USA |
Gloom, You think you are smart A honed stone that cuts so deep When you chop my heart It is never my defeat I made many me A huge forest with my seed Growing over years To live perpetually Praising God in no recline. -Silver Sharing God's Love through perfectlovepoetry.com |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
If I had the strength, I would have felt like doing the same...release this stress, but oh that poor tree.... *s M |
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Zinsser Senior Member
since 2001-02-27
Posts 1641Calif. |
I have the strength.... but the rest better left unsaid loved the write ... fits me to a T today |
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Mysteria 
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
that was really very, very good, but then you always have something wonderful hiding in that mind of yours! Enjoyed!The pursuit of truth and beauty is a sphere of activity in which we are permitted to remain children all our lives. |
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Thank you, Nan, No metaphor I swear, The tree was actually there, Well planned a chop with care. Thank you, Silver Streak, Once more you poetically pen Response to my meager effort No greater praise can you send. Thank you, Nakdthoughts, That tree had grown many years tall, But was half dead and destined to fall. Exercise and stress relief in it’s downing Crashes to peace when at last grounding. Thank you, Zinsser, Strength and desire As the wood and air to fire, Sometimes leaving unsaid The fires will spread. Thank you, Mysteria, Nothing else in mind this time, Except what the readers place there, But you’ve all have been so very kind, Responding with care. Gloom |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
PG...and if no one is there to hear it, would it still make a sound? Sorry, couldn't resist. Excellent metaphore wrapped into this one |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 BRAVO!!! Ooohhhhh...I love this metaphor too, sweet friend, I have never thought of the chips of the rock debauching from the rock symbolizing that before, this is a wonderfully inbtriguing poem, we all love you so much, this is excellent! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Aszard, thank you for sharing!   May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
ProfessorGloom~ In sad repose a log pile grows where used to grow a tree How happy is the fireplace with smoke going up the chimney ? Now I 'leaf' it to you to explain that to me~  It's a 'yoke' ... I swear~  No other rhyme - would I dare For who would disagree with a man with an axe to grind ... Not ME ... I'm a poet ... but NOT BLIND~ If I see that blade a'shining ... I'm splitting outta here~ Iffen you see me running ... know my hiney's in third gear~ Gone~ ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Man meets nature. Man wins....or does he? I enjoyed this sir. |
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wandering glider Senior Member
since 2001-04-04
Posts 501aloft |
Gloom, Transfering anger And perhaps rancor Upon that tree Will it free thee? Or is your victory Mere contradictory With what you enthrall In that tree fall? glider \\ |
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Thank you, hOOt_Owl_rn, Ah, that eternal question once more, I could write a book about it I sure, That and the one hand clapping sound, But the answer can be easily found Ask the wind.. What sounds it’s carrying Thank you, Mistletoe Angel, Always a delight When in response you write. Thank you, Marge Tindal, Not this year with it burn for heat, Though half dead the sap is still sweet And flowing to a few branches to fill, It will age and dry a while until The old wood stove it will greet. Thank you, Poet deVine, Ask the question in a thousand years See if we are still here. Thank you, wandering glider, Like I said before, no rancor, A calculating chop, nothing more, Picked a time that seemed good A time that suited the mood. Gloom |
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